John Spencer credited as playing...
Leo McGarry
- [discussing a large group of Cubans currently floating from Havana to Miami on rafts]
- Leo McGarry: How many are there?
- Josh Lyman: We don't know.
- Leo McGarry: What time exactly did they leave?
- Josh Lyman: We don't know.
- Leo McGarry: Do we know when they get here?
- Josh Lyman: No.
- Leo McGarry: True or false: If I were to stand on high ground in Key West with a good pair of binoculars, I'd be as informed as I am right now.
- Josh Lyman: That's true.
- Leo McGarry: The Intelligence budget's money well spent.
- C.J. Cregg: Is there anything I can say other than the President rode his bicycle into a tree?
- Leo McGarry: He hopes never to do it again.
- C.J. Cregg: Seriously, they're laughing pretty hard.
- Leo McGarry: He rode his bicycle into a tree, C.J., what do you want me - the President, while riding his bicycle on his vacation in Jackson Hole, came to a sudden arboreal stop.
- Leo McGarry: Margaret, please call the editor of the New York Times crossword and tell him that Khaddafi is spelled with an H and two D's and isn't a seven-letter word for anything.
- [after the President is injured in a bike accident]
- Mrs. Landingham: Oh, Mr. McGarry, have they done an X-ray?
- Leo McGarry: Yup.
- Mrs. Landingham: Is anything broken?
- Leo McGarry: A four-thousand-dollar "Lynex Titanium" touring bike that I swore I'd never lend anyone.
- [talking about the President's bike accident]
- Donna Moss: And what was the cause of the accident?
- Leo McGarry: What are you, from State Farm?
- Agent #1: It's a nice morning, Mr. McGarry.
- Leo McGarry: We'll take care of that in a hurry, won't we, Mike?
- Agent #1: Yes sir.
- Leo McGarry: [on the phone with the New York Times] 17 across. Yes, 17 across is wrong... You're spelling his name wrong... What's my name? My name doesn't matter. I am just an ordinary citizen who relies on the Times crossword for stimulation. And I'm telling you that I met the man twice. And I recommended a pre-emptive Exocet missile strike against his air force, so I think I know how...
- C.J. Cregg: Leo.
- Leo McGarry: They hang up on me every time.
- C.J. Cregg: That's almost hard to believe.
- Leo McGarry: Luther, ballpark, one year from today, where's the Dow?
- Economist #1: Tremendous. Up a thousand.
- Leo McGarry: Fred, one year from today?
- Economist #2: Not good. Down a thousand.
- Leo McGarry: A year from today at least one of you's gonna look pretty stupid.