Joel Hodgson credited as playing...
Joel Robinson
- Crow T. Robot: [Joel and Crow shout in horror as Tom explodes in the theater] IT'S ALL OVER THE SEAT!
- Joel Robinson: Gotta get him outta here! Come on, Crow!
- Joel Robinson: [Joel emerges from the theater carrying Tom, who's head has apparently exploded] TOM SERVO! OH MY GOD! TOM SERVO'S DEAD! He's dying! It must've been that movie! Oh man! We're losing him!
- Crow T. Robot: [on Shatner mode] A robot watches a bad film. It renders him unconscious. Next--on-- "Emergency 9-1-1"
- [gets slapped in the beak by Joel]
- Joel Robinson: Crow, ya gotta snap outta Shatner and help me! It means the life of our friend, Tom Servo!
- Crow T. Robot: [still acting like Shatner] But I must finish Tek-Wars of Venusia... must direct Star Trek 9: The Search For Spock's Intelligence!
- [Breaking character]
- Crow T. Robot: Hooker's a good cop! Whoa! He's a good--
- [gets slapped in the chin again]
- Joel Robinson: Crow, you listen to me and you listen good! I need ya to snap out of Shatner! I need you here now! Our friend's life hangs in the balance!
- Crow T. Robot: [sobbing] I'm sorry Joel, I didn't know...
- Joel Robinson: [hugs crow] I know, man, I know... but we gotta get our little buddy out of the bone orchard, okay? Listen, I need you to run along, get the defibulator, and I'm gonna try to get our brother Tommy out of the badlands...
- Crow T. Robot: Okay, alright...
- Joel Robinson: [to Tom] C'mon, man, come on back, we're all pulling for ya, buddy...
- Crow T. Robot: Hey Joel, is the defibulator the thing that looks like the vacuum cleaner or the thing that looks like the battery charger?
- Joel Robinson: It's the thing that looks like the battery charger! Now, would you get it together, man, and get out here, it means Tom Servo's life!
- [Crow arrives with the defibulator]
- Joel Robinson: Okay, hold on, buddy, it's coming!
- [Grabs the two probes from the defibulator]
- Joel Robinson: Come on home, Tom! Come on back, buddy! CLEAR!
- Crow T. Robot: Clear, clear...
- [Joel applies the probes to Tom's chest. Zap. He listens for a heartbeat]
- Joel Robinson: Nothing! CLEAR!
- Crow T. Robot: Clear, clear...
- [Joel zaps him again. He listens for a heartbeat]
- Joel Robinson: He's coming back! He's coming back!
- [Tom starts coughing and shaking]
- Crow T. Robot: Come on, Tommy!
- Tom Servo: [acting like Harey Carey] Sean Duncan up to the plate now... beautiful day here at Wrigley Field, boy, lemme tell ya! Perfect for an ice cold Budweiser! And you know, Lincoln Carpeting...
- [Tom shakes his head]
- Tom Servo: Joel! Crow! What the heck happened to me?
- Joel Robinson: It's okay, buddy, you're among the living now.
- Tom Servo: Whoa! That was weird. I was walking down a long hallway and at the end of it, there was a bright light and a kind man with a beard reaching his hand out to me, beckoning me, and he looked at me as I got closer and he said..."Hey Buddy, can ya spare some change, I want a cup of coffee!" Ha-ha!
- [Tom starts laughing; Joel and Crow are appalled]
- Joel Robinson: Oh, everything's a joke to you, that's great. We got commercial sign.
- Crow T. Robot: [annoyed] We shoulda let you die.
- Tom Servo: Ah, life!