Joel Hodgson credited as playing...
Joel Robinson
- Danny Winslow: I'm Danny. Danny Winslow. What's your name?
- Bix Dugan: [mumbling] Bix Dugan.
- Joel: Big Stupid?
- [the camera is positioned flat against the tracks as the train approaches]
- Crow T. Robot: [nervously] Uh, uh, camera 3 get off the track!
- [the train continues to approach]
- Crow T. Robot: CAMERA 3!
- Tom Servo, Joel, Crow T. Robot: [as the camera passes over them] AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!
- [to the opening credits music of "The Girl in Lovers' Lane"]
- Tom Servo: [singing] The Girl in Lovers' Lane
- Crow T. Robot: [singing] With Jack Elam, not Jack LaLanne
- Tom Servo: [singing, high-pitched] Jack LaLaaaannnne
- Joel: [singing] Lots of actors, there's no time to think
- Crow T. Robot: [singing] A screenplay by Jo Heims, that's pretty lame.
- Tom Servo: [softly] Pretty laaaame
- [Normal voice]
- Tom Servo: The entire crew, feels a sense of shame
- Crow T. Robot: [softly] Shame.
- Tom Servo: [singing] If only they had, half a brain, they could attain, a measure of fame, from a film like Shane! But no, to their disdain, The Girl in Lovers Lane.
- Crow T. Robot: [imitates whip; speaks in announcer voice] The Girl in Lovers' Lane!