Mark Harmon credited as playing...
Leroy Jethro Gibbs
- Tomas Zepeda: You're either DEA or Immigration. You're not FBI. They wear suits.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: NCIS.
- Ceasar Bernal: Navy cops.
- Tomas Zepeda: What'd we do to piss you off? Come on, man. We get blamed for everything these days. Help me out. We steal the Admiral's car?
- Ceasar Bernal: Or his calzoncillos?
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: You killed two Marines. The first in a drive-by shooting. The other in Rock Creek Park.
- Tomas Zepeda: Take me away.
- [motions to other gang members]
- Tomas Zepeda: You want one of them instead? Go with the Federales, they need a suspect.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: We know who did it.
- [puts photos on the table]
- Special Agent Timothy McGee: You can keep those.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Don't look surprised.
- Tomas Zepeda: I never seen them before.
- Special Agent Timothy McGee: They used to run your organization.
- Tomas Zepeda: Organization? We're a social club.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: You're not El Jefe.
- Tomas Zepeda: No? Who am I?
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: "El Gordo"?
- [Spanish, "The fat one?"]
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [everyone in the restaurant laughs] See? Nobody laughs at the boss. You have El Jefe give me a call, or I book him the next seat on the flight to Gitmo.
- Tomas Zepeda: You can't do that. We're not terrorists.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Ziva?
- Officer Ziva David: I'll have Tel Aviv produce an intercept between Al Qaeda and this... social club. You want photos?
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: That would be good.
- Officer Ziva David: It might take me twenty-four hours.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Okay. Twenty-four hours.
- Marine Lance Corporal Jose Silva: How much trouble am I in, sir?
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Trouble? Why would you say that?
- Marine Lance Corporal Jose Silva: Four NCIS agents escorting one lance corporal?
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: You got it all wrong, Marine. She's Mossad.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I could leave.
- NCIS Director Jenny Shepard: [opens the bag he brought] Salvadorian food, how *fried*.
- [Gibbs gets up to leave]
- NCIS Director Jenny Shepard: I'm sorry, stay.
- [McGee shows Tony the stubble he's growing]
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: DiNozzo.
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Hey, boss.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Why are you touching his face?
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: I don't know. It feels good, though. It's like a bunny rabbit.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [slapping Tony's head] Don't.
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Sorry.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Two kids found the First Sergeant floating under six inches of ice.
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Ice, that means...
- Officer Ziva David: You're going to make a really juvenile cold case joke?
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: It's a really good one, too.
- NCIS Director Jenny Shepard: [Gibbs is trying to read something in dim light] Where are your glasses?
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Forgot them.
- [Shepard then hands him her glasses]
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: DiNiozzo! Where the hell have you been?
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: I come bearing gifts. Spent the night at Rock Creek Park, and I found these when they drained the pond.
- [produces a trio of guns]
- Officer Ziva David: Whoa! That's a big one.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: You expecting an "attaboy"?
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: I thought it would be nice.
- [Tony flinches in anticipation of getting slapped on the head]
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [stroking the back of Tony's head] Attaboy.
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: I was just doing my job, boss.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I know that!
- Special Agent Timothy McGee: So, I'm not tough?
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: If you have to ask...
- Donald Mallard: [after sneezing] You know, the interesting thing about the sternutatory reflex is that no one knows exactly when it first began. Many theories abound.
- Jimmy Palmer: And you know them all, don't you, Dr. Mallard?
- Donald Mallard: Know them? I once wrote a sonnet on the subject for an old flame. She suffered from the most horrendous allergies. Yes, how did it go? "Doth thy heart skip a beat... "
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I'm not a big fan of poetry, Duck.
- Donald Mallard: As it turned out, neither was she. In fact...
- Special Agent Timothy McGee: So, hard freeze December ninth?
- Donald Mallard: Our key is that the bodies were not frozen inside the ice, but were below it.
- Special Agent Timothy McGee: So they died after the ninth?
- Donald Mallard: No, no, no, no. No, human bodies sink until the gases created by the internal putrefaction have had time to accumulate.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: How long does that take?
- Donald Mallard: Under the forecasted weather conditions? Ten to fourteen days.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Bodies went into the water between November twenty-fifth and December ninth, or they would have resurfaced to the top and ice would have formed around them.
- Donald Mallard: [pleased that Gibbs understands] Precisely.
- Donald Mallard: [noting the numerous bullet wounds on several bodies] Back, front, front, back. The pattern is quite random. I believe the phrase is "turkey shoot."
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: More like "massacre."