Rene Auberjonois credited as playing...
Constable Odo
- [first lines]
- Quark: [to a group of Bajoran maintence workers carrying several big crates] Just set them on the bar.
- [to Morn]
- Quark: Morn, no touching.
- [to the crowd of customers; in a loud voice]
- Quark: Do you what this is? Three cases of syrup of squill!
- Leeta: [eagerly] I love syrup of squill on my groat cakes. But I haven't seen a jar in over a year.
- Quark: No one has.
- Odo: Does this mean that the drought on Balancar is over?
- Quark: [pleased with himself] There never was a drought. It was all a ploy by their Agricultural Consortium. They've been stockpiling squill so they could drive the prices up.
- Leeta: [vexed] *That's* dishonest!
- Quark: [still pleased with himself; as he props himself on the bar counter] I couldn't agree more. You know... I once did business with the nephew of the cousin of the stepsister of a friend of the secretary to the consortium's chief accountant.
- [pause; Quark checks himself]
- Quark: [mumbling] Um... nephew, cousin... stepsister... friend... Yup, that's right!
- Quark: [back to an audible voice] And he told me, in passing, that the accountant had bought himself a very nice pair of Ferengi rain slippers.
- Odo: [dryily] And... if there *was* a drought, he wouldn't need rain slippers.
- Quark: My thoughts exactly!
- [boastful, with his chest puffed up]
- Quark: So... I set up a meeting with this accountant and told him that he either provide me with a shipment of syrup, or I'd expose their deception to the entire quadrant!
- [the crowd applauds]
- Quark: [holding up a jar of syrup] Tomorrow morning, we're having a special on groat cakes with syrup of squill - that is, for anyone who can afford it!