Charlie Sheen credited as playing...
Charlie Harper
- Alan Harper: Anyway, you, me and Mom are taking Jake to a show: Magic Hats Club.
- Charlie Harper: You invited Mom?
- Alan Harper: You want to tell her she can't come to her only grandchild's birthday? 'Cause believe me, I *tried*.
- Charlie Harper: Oh, man.
- Alan Harper: Look at the bright side. Maybe we can bribe one of the magicians to get her sawed in half.
- Judith: I will rock his world! I swear!
- Alan Harper: You're bluffing.
- Judith: Oh, am I? Watch me! Come on, Charlie.
- [Judith grabs Charlie's arm and starts leading him upstairs]
- Charlie Harper: Alan?
- Alan Harper: She's bluffing, Charlie.
- Charlie Harper: Are you sure?
- Alan Harper: Trust me. She hates you.
- Charlie Harper: Trust *me*. That doesn't always stop them!