Jay Baruchel credited as playing...
Hiccup
- [last lines]
- Hiccup: This is Berk. It snows nine months of the year, and hails the other three. Any food that grows here is tough and tasteless. The people that grow here are even more so. The only upsides are the pets. While other places have ponies or parrots... we have... dragons.
- Astrid: It's a mess. You must feel horrible. You've lost everything. Your father, your tribe, your best friend...
- Hiccup: Thank you for summing that up.
- [silence]
- Hiccup: Why couldn't I have killed that dragon when I found him in the woods? Would've been better, for everyone...
- Astrid: Yep. The rest of us would have done it. So why didn't you?
- [pauses]
- Astrid: Why didn't you?
- Hiccup: I don't know... I couldn't.
- Astrid: That's not an answer.
- Hiccup: *Why* is this so important to you all of a sudden?
- Astrid: Because I want to remember what you say, *right now*.
- Hiccup: Oh, for the love of... I was a coward! I was weak! I wouldn't kill a dragon!
- Astrid: You said *wouldn't*, that time.
- Hiccup: Agh, whatever... I *wouldn't*! Three hundred years, and I'm the first Viking who wouldn't kill a dragon!
- [pause]
- Astrid: First to ride one, though. So...?
- Hiccup: I wouldn't kill him, because he looked as frightened as *I* was. I looked at him... and I saw myself.
- Hiccup: [about the Night Fury] I really did hit one.
- Gobber: Sure.
- Hiccup: He never listens!
- Gobber: Well, it runs in the family.
- Hiccup: And when he does, it's always with this... disappointed scowl, like someone skimped on the meat in his sandwich.
- [imitating]
- Hiccup: "Excuse me, barmaid! I'm afraid you brought me the wrong offspring! I ordered an extra-large boy with beefy arms, extra guts and glory on the side. This here, this is a talking fish-bone!"
- Gobber: Now, you're thinkin' about this all wrong. It's not so much what you *look* like, it's what's *inside* that he can't stand.
- [pause]
- Hiccup: [sarcastic] Thank you for summing that up.
- Gobber: Look the point is, stop trying so hard to be something you're not!
- Hiccup: I just wanna be one of you guys!
- Hiccup: [about Berk's dragon problem] Most people would leave. Not us. We're Vikings. We... have stubbornness issues.
- [first lines]
- Hiccup: [voice-over] This is Berk. It's twelve days north of Hopeless and a few degrees south of Freezing to Death. It's located solidly on the Meridian of Misery. My village. In a word? Sturdy. It's been here for seven generations, but every single building is new. We have fishing, hunting, and a charming view of the sunsets. The only problems are the pests. You see, most places have mice or mosquitoes... We have...
- [aloud, as he slams the door against an attacking Monstrous Nightmare]
- Hiccup: Dragons!
- Astrid: [hanging from a tree branch] Hiccup! Get me *down* from here!
- Hiccup: [pleading] You have to give me a chance to explain!
- Astrid: I am not listening to *anything* you have to say!
- Hiccup: Then I won't speak. Just let me *show* you. Please, Astrid.
- [Astrid lifts herself up and gingerly climbs onto Toothless's back]
- Astrid: Now get me down.
- Hiccup: Toothless, down. *Gently.*
- [Toothless spreads his wings, and the wind slowly lifts them into the air]
- Hiccup: See? Nothing to be afraid of...
- [Toothless launches himself into the sky at top speed, Astrid screams]
- Hiccup: Augh! Toothless! What is *wrong* with you? Bad dragon! A-ha, he's uh, he's not usually like this... Oh no...
- [Toothless rolls to the side and dives straight down, plunging in and out of the waves; Astrid screams]
- Hiccup: Toothless, what are you doing, we need her to *like* us!
- [Toothless soars up again and starts doing aileron rolls]
- Hiccup: And now, the spinning. Thank you for *nothing*, you useless reptile!
- Astrid: [terrified] Okay, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Just get me off of this thing!
- [Toothless looks back at her, pleased, then spreads his wings and rises gently into the sky]
- Hiccup: [as Toothless gestures for him to get on] You got it, bud.
- [He mounts Toothless, preparing to fly after the Green Death dragon]
- Stoick: [grabbing Hiccup's arm] Hiccup!... I'm sorry. For-for everything.
- Hiccup: Yeah, me too.
- Stoick: You don't have to go up there.
- Hiccup: [smiling] We're Vikings. It's an occupational hazard.
- Stoick: [taking his hand] I'm proud to call you my son.
- Hiccup: Thanks, Dad.
- [takes off]
- Hiccup: [Walking through the forest and crossing out his map] Oh, the gods hate me. Some people lose their knife or their mug... No, not me, I manage to lose an entire *dragon*?
- [Hits a branch and it lashes back, smacking him in the face]
- Hiccup: [to Toothless] We're leaving! Let's pack up. Looks like you and me are taking a little vacation. Forever.
- [he bends over his pack]
- Hiccup: Ah man.
- [looking up, he sees Astrid sitting on a boulder, sharpening her axe]
- Hiccup: Agh! What the... uh, uh, what are you doing here?
- Astrid: I want to know what's going on.
- [she jumps down and menaces him with the axe]
- Astrid: No one just *gets* as good as you do. *Especially* you. Start talking! Are you training with someone?
- Hiccup: Uh, uh, training? I didn't...
- Astrid: [grabbing his flight gear] It better not involve *this*...
- Hiccup: I, I know, this... looks really bad, but, you see, this is uh...
- [there's a rustling behind them and she looks over his shoulder toward the noise]
- Hiccup: [trying to distract her] Uh, you're right! You're right, you're right. I, I'm through with the lies, I've been making... outfits! So, you got me. It's time everyone knew. Drag me back, go ahead... here we go...
- [she twists his arm, throwing him to the ground]
- Hiccup: OW! Why would you *do* that?
- Astrid: That's for the lies! And *that's*...
- [she drops the butt of her axe on his chest]
- Astrid: ... for everything else!
- [Toothless emerges a few feet away]
- Hiccup: Oh man...
- Astrid: [gasps and throws them both to the ground] Get down!
- [Toothless charges, she pushes Hiccup away and raises her axe]
- Astrid: RUN! RUN!
- Hiccup: [grabbing the axe and throwing it away] No! No! It's okay, it's okay!
- [to Toothless]
- Hiccup: She's a friend.
- [to Astrid, holding Toothless back]
- Hiccup: You scared him.
- Astrid: *I* scared *him*? Who is "him"?
- Hiccup: Uh... Astrid, Toothless! Toothless, Astrid.
- [Toothless snarls, Astrid shakes her head in bewilderment and runs off]
- Hiccup: Duh-duh-duh, we're dead!
- Hiccup: [narrating] My name's Hiccup. Great name, I know. But, it's not the worst. Parents believe a hideous name will frighten off gnomes and trolls. Like our charming Viking demeanor wouldn't do that.
- Viking: [screams in Hiccup's face] RAAAAHHHR!
- [casually]
- Viking: Morning!
- Hiccup: [Stoick has just thrust a large battle axe into his hands] I... don't wanna fight dragons.
- Stoick: [chuckles] Oh, come on, yes you do.
- Hiccup: Rephrase: Dad, I *can't* kill dragons.
- Stoick: But you *will* kill dragons!
- Hiccup: No, I'm really, very extra sure that I *won't*.
- Stoick: It's time, Hiccup...
- Hiccup: Can you not *hear* me?
- Stoick: This is *serious*, son. When you carry this axe, you carry all of us with you. Which means, you walk like us, you talk like us, and you think like us. No more of... this!
- [gestures to all of Hiccup]
- Hiccup: [miffed] You just gestured to *all* of me.
- Stoick: Deal?
- Hiccup: This conversation is feeling very one-sided...
- Stoick: *Deal*?
- Hiccup: [sighs, giving in] Deal.
- Hiccup: [reading in the Dragon Manual] Dragon classifications. Strength Class, Fear Class, Mystery Class. Thunderdrum: This reclusive dragon inhabits sea caves and dark tide pools. When startled, the Thunderdrum produces a concussive sound that can kill a man at close range. Extremely dangerous, kill on sight.
- [turns page]
- Hiccup: Timberjack: This gigantic creature has razor-sharp wings that can slice through full-grown trees. Extremely dangerous, kill on sight.
- [turns page]
- Hiccup: Scaldron: Sprays scalding water at its victim, extremely dangerous...
- [thunder, Hiccup jumps]
- Hiccup: Changeling: Even newly hatched dragons can spray acid, kill on sight.
- [flipping pages faster]
- Hiccup: Gronkles, Zippleback, the Skrill... Boneknapper... Whispering Death... Burns its victims, buries its victims, chokes its victims, turns its victims inside-out... Extremely dangerous, extremely dangerous... kill on sight, kill on sight, kill on sight... Night Fury. Speed unknown. Size unknown. The unholy offspring of lightning and death itself. Never engage this dragon. Your only chance: hide and pray it does not find you.
- [during the final rounds of dragon training, Astrid notices Hiccup next to her and yanks his shield down, thrusting her face next to his]
- Astrid: Stay out of my way! I'm winning this thing!
- Hiccup: Uh... please, by all means.
- [Astrid approaches the Gronkle stealthily]
- Astrid: This time! This time, for sure!
- [She springs up and charges with a yell... only to see that Hiccup has already "subdued" it. The crowd cheers]
- Astrid: [swinging her axe wildly in anger] NO! YOU SON OF A HALF-TROLL, RAT-EATING, MUNGE-BUCKET!
- [Hiccup prepares to open one of the dragon pens]
- Fishlegs: If you're planning on getting eaten, I'd definitely go with the Gronkle.
- [Hiccup turns in surprise and sees his entire class lined up behind him]
- Tuffnut: [approaching] You were wise to seek help from the world's most deadly weapon...
- Hiccup: Um...
- Tuffnut: It's me.
- Snotlout: [shoves Tuffnut aside] I love this plan!
- Hiccup: I... didn't...
- Ruffnut: [shoves Snotlout aside] You're crazy!
- [leans in, flirtatiously]
- Ruffnut: I like that...
- Astrid: [firmly yanks her away] So... what is the plan?