Dorian Missick credited as playing...
Vic Vance
- Vic Vance: [Finds Lance searching the house] Lance! Lance, get over here and explain yourself!
- Lance Vance: Shhh!
- Vic Vance: Stop acting like a child!
- Lance Vance: Shhh!
- Vic Vance: Don't you shush me!
- Lance Vance: [Speaking in a hushed tone] Keep your voice down.
- Vic Vance: No! You can barely tie your own shoelaces and you're telling me how to behave?
- Lance Vance: [Yelling] Will you shut up, you stupid gorilla? The place is bugged! The DEA is onto us! Happy now?
- Armando Mendez: So, now we're together. And yet, business is hard. this industry is full of criminals.
- Vic Vance: Oh, yeah?
- Armando Mendez: Money can be so corrupting. I find it very distasteful.
- Vic Vance: Heh. Well, you know, that's the deal with the drug trade. It attracts the wrong sort.
- Armando Mendez: Quite. Are you trustworthy, my friend?
- Vic Vance: I don't know. After what I've been through recently, I'd say... Probably not.
- Lance Vance: Hey, Vic. Like the new threads?
- Vic Vance: Terrifying. I need to use the phone
- [Calls Martinez]
- Jerry Martinez: Yeah?
- Vic Vance: Thanks for the coke, Martinez. Now you know how it feels to get fucked.
- Jerry Martinez: Oh, you fucked us both, Vic. That coke you ripped off belonged to the Mendez brothers. I was just the shepherd. Now we're all on their shit list and the only way off is in a fucking bag. I'm turning states. I'm gonna ruin you, you brother, Mendez, everyone! Happy Holidays.
- Vic Vance: [Hangs up and turn to Lance] Lance! You useless degenerate asshole!
- Phil Collins: Look, Barry, when I agreed to play Vice City, I didn't expect it to be my swan song.
- Barry: It's no problem, mate. Just some nutcase trying it on.
- Vic Vance: Hey, aren't you...
- Phil Collins: Phil, mate. Phil Collins.
- Barry: Let's do the meet and greet another time, eh? Come on.
- Vic Vance: Do you think we can trust Diaz?
- Lance Vance: My man Diaz is a businessman.
- Vic Vance: Great. That's a "no" then.
- Vic Vance: [finds Louise dying from two gunshot wounds to the torso, and Lance unconscious] Louise!
- Louise Cassidy- Williams: [dying] Hey... Vic... You came for me... No one ever really did much for me before... That's... sweet of you.
- Vic Vance: Hey, hey, come on, listen... Let's get you to a hospital
- Louise Cassidy- Williams: I don't think... There's much point in that.
- Vic Vance: Come on, Louise.
- Louise Cassidy- Williams: We could've had... Something special.
- Vic Vance: Yeah. No, we did have something special.
- Louise Cassidy- Williams: Make sure Mary-Jo takes care of my baby.
- [Louise dies]
- Vic Vance: Oh, Louise...
- [Vic breaks down and cries over Louise's body]
- Vic Vance: Louise...
- [Vic finally gets up and starts walking away. Lance regains consciousness and spots him]
- Lance Vance: Hey, Vic, I know you cared about her, man. But she wasn't right for you.
- [Vic stops in his tracks for a moment, then shakes his head in disgust and walks away]
- Lance Vance: Vic... Hey, Vic... Family is what matters... Oh, damn.
- [Lance gets up and starts limping away]
- Lance Vance: Alright... Alright... Okay, I'm gonna make it. I can make it. I know I can, man...
- Vic Vance: Hey, watch the road!
- Lance Vance: [Both scream in unison after Lance hits a jump] OH, SHIIIIIIIIIIT!
- Vic Vance: OH, SHIIIIIIIIIIT!
- Jerry Martinez: Listen, if plans change, I'll let you know.
- [Hands Vic a pager]
- Vic Vance: What's this?
- Jerry Martinez: It's a pager, tough guy. Welcome to the 80's, Vic.
- Lance Vance: Hey, bro! Ha, ha!
- Vic Vance: Lance?
- Lance Vance: Hey!
- Vic Vance: What are you doing here?
- Lance Vance: You don't sound so pleased!
- Vic Vance: I'm not so pleased.
- Lance Vance: Thanks, bro. Who was you expecting? What a greeting, man.
- Vic Vance: Not you. Someone useful.
- Lance Vance: So, what am I? A handicap, huh? Your dumbass, lowlife, no-good brother?
- Vic Vance: Something like that.
- Lance Vance: Yeah? Well, I'm not the one who got kicked out of the Army.
- Vic Vance: No, you're the asshole who got kicked out of the Boy Scouts.
- Lance Vance: Oh, come on, man. I come all this way to see you and you treat me like I got herpes.
- Vic Vance: Maybe that's because your whole life, you've gotten us into trouble.
- Lance Vance: Oh, give me a break, man! I've changed!
- Vic Vance: [pause] Okay, I'll give you a chance. One chance!
- Lance Vance: Oh, yeah, yeah! Hey, come here, man!
- [Hugs Vic]
- Lance Vance: You won't regret it, baby! I love you, man! And love can change the world. But Vic...
- Lance Vance: What?
- Lance Vance: [In mock seriousness] I have got herpes.
- Vic Vance: [Pushes Lance away] Get off me, man! Just get in the damn car!
- Lance Vance: Ha, ha, ha! I'm just kidding!
- Vic Vance: [Lance and Vic discover their mom took all their coke] So what do we do now, moron?
- Lance Vance: Wait, wait, wait. Let me think. I know we can make it right! We'll just... uh, uh... We'll explain things to the Mendez brothers.
- Vic Vance: Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm sure that between chopping us up and feeding us to their dogs, they'll be very understanding! Lance, if we get out of this, I'm gonna KILL YOU! Asshole!
- Marty Williams: Okay, we're here. Now, get on in there and teach them idiots a lesson.
- Vic Vance: You're not coming?
- Marty Williams: Why would I employ a dog, then bark myself?
- Lance Vance: I'm the black killa from Manila! The Manila Blilla!
- Vic Vance: You're a blidiot. Now shut up.
- Jerry Martinez: Hey, look who it is! Victor Vance! What's going on, amigo? You want some smoke?
- Vic Vance: Fuck you, Martinez.
- Jerry Martinez: Relax! You're so fucking histrionic. It's like hanging out with a bitch on her period.
- Vic Vance: You want me to fuck you up?
- Jerry Martinez: Whatever, baby. The thing is, you work for Phil. And Phil - Phil works for me. Which makes you my bitch's bitch. Figure that out.
- Vic Vance: I'm looking for someone called Reni.
- [Frankie points out Reni, who raises his/her arms]
- Frankie: Ta-daa.
- Vic Vance: Uh, yeah... Spitz said you might want something?
- Reni Wassulmaier: Something? Ah! Cocaine! Darling, I want cocaine! Mummy wants some snort and she wants it now! You must be the cocaine man. Frankie, the cocaine man is here!
- [Reni and Frankie both jump excitedly]
- Vic Vance: [sarcastically] Hey! You think you can say it any louder? I don't think they heard you in Cuba.
- Reni Wassulmaier: Oh, you fucking square. It's only a bit of snow. It's nineteen-eighty-fucking-four, darling. Everyone is on cocaine!
- Vic Vance: Whatever you say, mister... uh... lady... err...
- Reni Wassulmaier: Oh, darling, I'm a little bit of everything. I'm universal. Reni Wassulmaier. But you, angel, you're unique. Can I film you undressing?
- [Reni introduces Vic and Barry to each other]
- Reni Wassulmaier: Darling, this is darling. Darling, darling. Wunderbar. So now we are acquainted, no? Who wants to oompah?
- Vic Vance: [to Barry] Uh, I'm Vic.
- Barry: Alright? Barry, mate.
- Armando Mendez: So, you are finished.
- Vic Vance: Yeah.
- Armando Mendez: Diego, they are finished.
- Diego Mendez: Buenos.
- Armando Mendez: And none of us dead. The civilized life of gentlemen. We have our money, so you are free. You must leave town, of course, and give us control of your other interests.
- Vic Vance: What?
- Armando Mendez: But you, your families, no one will die. This is fair.
- Lance Vance: Fair? Oh, yeah, if you think getting screwed in the ass and then paying for it is fair, then it sounds like a great deal.
- Armando Mendez: I find your attitude and your language terribly distasteful.
- Diego Mendez: Maricon...
- Vic Vance: Hey, hold on, hold on, listen, Mr. Mendez. Listen, I... WE have done a lot of things for you. We kept up our end of the bargain, and now you want us to give up our interests?
- Armando Mendez: You came to my town, you run around like a maniac, you bring the police and the DEA into my life, and now I want you gone. You're very lucky you're not dead.
- Lance Vance: Argh...
- Vic Vance: Hey, listen, I made a ton of money for you. Money I didn't lose.
- Armando Mendez: And now... you're done.
- Lance Vance: Aw...
- Armando Mendez: You're obsolete.