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Jim Carrey in A Christmas Carol (2009)

Gary Oldman: Bob Cratchit • Marley • Tiny Tim

A Christmas Carol

Gary Oldman credited as playing...

Bob Cratchit • Marley • Tiny Tim

Photos6

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Quotes3

  • [from trailer]
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: What do you want with me?
  • Jacob Marley: You will be haunted by three spirits.
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: I'd rather not.
  • Fred: Merry Christmas, Uncle! God save you.
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Bah! Humbug!
  • Fred: Christmas a humbug? Uncle! You don't mean that.
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Merry Christmas. What reason have you to be merry? You're poor enough.
  • Fred: What right have you to be so dismal? You're rich enough.
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Humbug!
  • Fred: Don't be cross, Uncle.
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: What else can I be when I live in such a world of fools as this? Merry Christmas. What's Christmastime to you but a time for paying bills without money. A time for finding yourself a year older and not a penny richer. If I could work my will, every idiot who goes about with "Merry Christmas" on his lips should be boiled in his own pudding and buried with a stake of holly through his heart!
  • Fred: Uncle!
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Nephew! Keep Christmas in your own way and let me keep it in mine.
  • Fred: Keep it? But you don't keep it!
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Let me leave it alone then. Much good it has ever done you.
  • Fred: There are many things from which I have derived good and have not profited. Christmas being among them. But I have always thought of Christmas as a kind, charitable time. The only time when men open their shut-up hearts and think of all people as fellow travelers to the grave and not some other race of creatures bound on other journeys. And therefore, Uncle... although it has never put a scrap of gold or silver in my pocket, I believe it has done me good, and I say, God bless it!
  • Bob Cratchit: [claps and chuckles]
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Let me hear another sound out of you, Cratchit, and you'll keep Christmas by losing your situation!
  • [to Fred]
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: You're quite a powerful speaker, sir. A wonder you don't go into Parliament.
  • Fred: Don't be cross, Uncle. Come, dine with us tomorrow.
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: I'll see you in Hell first.
  • Fred: But why? Why so cold-hearted, Uncle? Why?
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Why did you get married?
  • Fred: Because I fell in love.
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Because... you fell... in love? Good afternoon.
  • Fred: I want nothing from you. I ask nothing of you. Why can't we be friends?
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Good afternoon.
  • Fred: I'm sorry, with all my heart, to find you so resolute. But I have made the trial in homage to Christmas, and therefore, Merry Christmas, Uncle!
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Good afternoon!
  • Fred: And a Happy New Year!
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Good afternoon!
  • Fred: And a very Merry Christmas to you too, Mr. Cratchit.
  • Bob Cratchit: Merry Christmas to you, sir.
  • Jacob Marley: You do not believe in me.
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: I don't?
  • Jacob Marley: Why do you doubt your senses?
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Because a little thing affects them. A slight disorder of the stomach makes them cheats. You may be an undigested bit of beef, a blot of mustard, a crumb of cheese, a fragment of an underdone potato. There's more of gravy than of grave about you, whatever you are.
  • [Marley gets up, screaming at him]
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: Mercy! Dreadful apparition, why do you trouble me?
  • Jacob Marley: Man of worldly mind, do you believe in me or not?
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: I do! I must!
  • Jacob Marley: WOE! Woe is me!
  • Ebenezer Scrooge: You are fettered in chains. Why?

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