Joel McHale credited as playing...
Elliot
- Elliot: Weenie. When did you get here?
- Mr. Weenie: Don't you see. Boog, McSquizzy, Giselle. They'll all be torn to pieces.
- Elliot: Torn to "pizzas"?
- Mr. Weenie: Pieces, you strudelkopf.
- Elliot: If this is the end, I need to say something. Giselle, I really, really, really...
- Roger: Really?
- Fifi: Time's up!
- Charlene: Now you hold your little old horses, Fifi. I do believe this boy's got something on his mind.
- Rufus: Yeah, give the guy a sporting chance.
- Giselle: Oh, just forget it, Elliot. You've already made it clear how you feel.
- Fifi: I feel this has gone long enough.
- Elliot: Please let me finish!
- Fifi: Fine. You've got 60 seconds.
- Elliot: Are you serious? How about a minute?
- Roberto: Hey, you better hurry up.
- Elliot: Okay, okay. Giselle, before the wedding, my rack was huge.
- Giselle: What?
- Buddy: It's true.
- Elliot: Very huge. And it broke very bad. And without my huge rack, I felt like less of a buck. But as time went on...
- Fifi: Thirty seconds!
- Elliot: The point is, I'm a better buck with not a huge rack on my head... but with you, Giselle, on my head instead.
- McSquizzy: Oh, that's awful.
- Giselle: And how does this relate to our wedding and the fact that you left me stranded at the altar?
- Charlene: Left you at the altar?
- Rufus: You, sir, are a coward.
- Elliot: [to Fifi] No, no. You are missing the point.
- Fifi: Oh, come on!
- Elliot: [to Giselle] During our wedding, there was the incident with the other woman.
- Rufus: Another woman?
- [the others gasps]
- Roberto: I can't even handle one.
- Rico: Speak for yourself, amigo.
- Elliot: No. No. Not that kind of other woman. The kind that grabbed Mr. Weenie.
- Charlene: You're disgusting. You make me sick.
- Rufus: That is a pig.
- Stanley: [to Roger] This is getting good.
- Fifi: Fifteen seconds!
- Elliot: [grunts] Will you, please?
- [to Giselle]
- Elliot: Giselle, you are good. And me? Not always good. But with you, the me that is not good can be better. You make my not-good me almost not bad. And that's not almost good, it's almost great.
- [Fifi starts saying "Tick"]
- Elliot: So, Giselle, you and me, not badder, but greater. Understand?
- [the others says "What?"]
- Rufus: What is he talking about?
- Fifi: Tick, tick, tick!
- Elliot: Oh, forget it. Just push the button already!
- Fifi: Finally.
- McSquizzy: No!
- Giselle: Don't.
- Boog: [sliding down the water slide] Cannonball!
- [grabs Elliot, Giselle, McSquizzy and Buddy]
- Boog: Gotcha.
- Elliot: I love you, Boog.