Simon Helberg credited as playing...
Howard Wolowitz
- Penny: I know this is none of my business, but I just... I have to ask - what's Sheldon's deal?
- Leonard Hofstadter: What do you mean, "deal"?
- Penny: You know, like, what's his deal? Is it girls...? Guys...? Sock puppets...?
- Leonard Hofstadter: Honestly, we've been operating under the assumption that he has no deal.
- Penny: Come on, everybody has a deal.
- Howard Wolowitz: Not Sheldon. Over the years, we've formulated many theories about how he might reproduce. I'm an advocate of mitosis.
- Penny: I'm sorry?
- Howard Wolowitz: I believe one day Sheldon will eat an enormous amount of Thai food and split into two Sheldons.
- Leonard Hofstadter: On the other hand, I think Sheldon might be the larval form of his species. Someday he'll spin a cocoon and emerge two months later with moth wings and an exoskeleton.
- Penny: Okay, well, thanks for the nightmares.
- [Sheldon has just accepted a graduate student's request for dinner in his place]
- Sheldon Cooper: What a nice girl.
- Howard Wolowitz: Sheldon, do you have any idea what just happened?
- Sheldon Cooper: Yes, apparently I'm getting a free dinner.
- Rajesh Koothrappali: I love this time of the year. The leaves are turning... there's a bracing chill in the air...
- Howard Wolowitz: Plus, there's a whole new crop of female grad students about to put on just enough winter weight to make them needy and vulnerable.
- Howard Wolowitz: [Howard introduces himself] Howard Wolowitz, Department of Engineering, co-designer of the International Space Station's liquid waste disposal system.
- Ramona Nowitzki: Eww.
- Sheldon Cooper: [to female grad student] Amazing! An intelligent labradoodle.
- Howard Wolowitz: [to same grad student] Woof.