Sean Murray credited as playing...
Timothy McGee
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Enjoy it while it lasts, women are trouble. Haven't you learned anything from me?
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Yeah, not to go on undercover dates with a doctor whose father is the world's biggest arms dealer.
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: ...That's low, Probie.
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: The sadness when I hear you talk like this. You don't know who these people are. It could be a 45 year-old overweight man in Minnesota. I mean, like you said, you two haven't even met yet.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: What part of "Level 5 sorceress" don't you understand?
- NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [entering] All of it.
- [McGee has hooked up an old "Beary Smiles" toy to his keyboard]
- Beary Smiles: Hi, there! I'm Beary Smiles! You're my best friend, McGee!
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Thank you, Beary.
- Beary Smiles: You're very welcome!
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: All right, one more time and I'm going to rip that Bear's head off... AGAIN!
- Beary Smiles: Gear up, DiNozzo! Got a body at Quantico!
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Don't mess with me!
- Ziva David, Mossad Liaison: That bear sounds very familiar.
- Beary Smiles: Ya think, David? DiNozzo, bag and tag! David, witness statements! McGee, I ever tell you how brilliant you are?
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Oh, Beary...
- Beary Smiles: I love you, McGee.
- [Noticing Tony and Ziva's looks, McGee looks over his shoulder and sees Gibbs glaring at him. He types again]
- Beary Smiles: Sorry, Boss.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Tony, I get it. You're jealous. You haven't had a date in a while, it's okay.
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Me? Jealous of the Elf Lord? I think you have me confused with someone who is far less awesome.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Why don't we just bring her in?
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Yeah, what are we going to put on the warrant, Probie? "Gibbs's gut?"
- [off Gibbs's look]
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Not that that wouldn't be valid. I'm sure that...
- NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Talk to her friends, she'll come to us.
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Ziva and I will cover the interviews for you.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: That is awfully un-Tony of you, Tony.
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Just doing you a solid, Probie, because you having a date is about as rare as me not having one.