Plot

Local Hillbilly Icon Daniel Boone Owen has gone missing in Appalachia. He was last seen facedown in his favorite watering hole, Scatterbrain's, and the theories behind his disappearance are as numerous as they are hilarious. The predominant theory--alien abduction--is supported by local nut Pooter Brown, who claims to personally have been abducted every Christmas Eve for the past 16 years. After spanning the Carolina Appalachians, the story ends with a shocker you must see to believe.—james bubba cromer

The Hills Have Thighs The Hills Have Thighs is an hysterical Appalachian Comedy that centers around the sudden disappearance of a local hillbilly icon named Daniel Boone Owen, who vanishes one night after a corn liquor-induced stupor. The hilarious journey throughout Appalachia features colorful, larger than life characters struggling to get to the bottom of this mystery. The theories vary from his driving off of Issaqueena Falls, being murdered by local tourists, getting abducted by aliens, and even suffering a gruesome death by black bear. One person in particular, Pooter Brown a self-proclaimed UFO-abductee of 16 prior Christmas Evespromotes the most popular theory: Dan has vanished into a Wormhole.

After a story spanning Upper Pickens County, South Carolina and lower Transylvania County, North Carolina, the story unfolds with a shocker ending you will have to see to believe. The Hills Have Thighs features a spray of characters ranging from a closeted homosexual hillbilly named Drip, who has a propensity to dribble a little urine in his overalls, to an Obama-obsessed Limousine Liberal from California named Tree-Tree, who has a penchant for Mammy Dolls and sees nothing wrong with her extensive collection of Negrobelia, to two lesbian sisters Twinkie and Velvetta Adams who are forced to live in the cellar, to a colorful variety of big-boned ladies with even larger attitudes.