Sean Murray credited as playing...
Timothy McGee
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Boss, I better go down, reschedule this polygraph test.
- NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Don't bother, McGee. Nothing wrong with the first one.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: What do you mean?
- NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I think you made an impression on the examiner.
- [McGee looks confused]
- NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I think she made an excuse to see you again.
- [McGee still looks confused]
- NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: You want me to draw you a picture?
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: [McGee understands] No. I'm going to handle her boss.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Is that pastrami?
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Yes.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Can I have some?
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: No. This is my dinner. You can have the pickle.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: I don't like pickles.
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: I know.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: [Watching Gibbs in interrogation] So what do you think? How's he going to break her down? What's the style?
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: He's leading with Creepy Uncle, but I think he's gonna go with Father Figure you can trust.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Nope. Just doesn't feel right. I am going to go with the classic in your face Gibbs the Intimidator.
- Ziva David, Former Mossad Liaison: Don't think so.
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: No.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Have you ever heard of an agent having to retake their test?
- Abby Sciuto: [Abby sighs] Special Agent Krischner.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Kirschner?
- Abby Sciuto: Yeah. He was gone before you got here. He was, um, he was let go.
- [outside the police impound lot, McGee loads a paintball gun]
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Are you sure that thing's gonna work?
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Yeah. It's my own personal concoction of oatmeal, mayonnaise, and carpenter's glue. Perfectly simulates bird droppings.
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Us grown-ups use a different word for it.
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Used it very successfully in the Chesapeake team paintball finals last summer.
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Paintball? Cool. All right, so that's the camera you want to hit with your bird poop, McSniper.
- [McGee fires, splattering white goo all over the camera lens]
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Hmm, nice shot. I'm impressed.
- [Tony starts to climb the fence to the police impound lot, McGee hesitates]
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: What?
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: You're sure there're no dogs?
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: I don't see any dogs, I don't hear any dogs, so no, there are no dogs!
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: [hears barking] Dogs, McGee! Dogs!
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Yeah, right.
- NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: [panicking] Real dogs! Big dogs! Get out of here!
- NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: You said there weren't any dogs!