Christopher McCulloch: Hank Venture • The Monarch • Sgt. Hatred • ...

Pinstripes and Poltergeists

Hank Venture • The Monarch • Sgt. Hatred • Henchman 24 • Hunter Gathers • Pete White • Tim-Tom • Monstroso • Dr. Schumpmaker • Sky Pilot

Henchman 21: What's the meaning of life?
Henchman 24: The color twelve.
Henchman 21: Really?
Henchman 24: No, idiot! Ask me something less Hitchhiker's Guide, dork!
Henchman 21: Do we have souls?
Henchman 24: Yeah. Well, not quite souls but, it's a general idea. Everything has a soul.
Henchman 21: Crap. So I guess I should become a vegetarian?
Henchman 24: No. Like everything living has a soul. Even spinach. You can't win.

Henchman 24: You know how people cry about aborting babies because of their "soul"? It turns out you don't get a soul till' you're like one.
Henchman 21: So weird. One? Really?
Henchman 24: Or maybe six months, I forget. Anyway, you're just this crying... pooing... monster blob till you get your soul.

Henchman 21: Dude, I barely believe you're real. I mean, if there were ghosts, they'd be freakin' everywhere!
Henchman 24: Eh, not necessarily. You can only haunt someone you were close to in life.
Henchman 21: And you chose me? Out of everything, you chose me?
Henchman 24: Uh, before you get all teary-eyed, I could only choose between YOU, and a cocoon that is constantly getting blown up.

Hunter Gathers: Damn it Shore Leave, you've ruined another outfit. Think Betsy Ross works here? I'm the one who has to sew this back together, you clown.
[Brock laughs]
Hunter Gathers: What are you laughing at, Mr. Blood Stains on Everything?
Brock Samson: You know that he rips those himself. He just tears it off like a Chippendales firemen, every time.
Hunter Gathers: Good god, why?
Shore Leave: For one, because it looks super-cool.
Hunter Gathers: You're an infant!

Dr. Schumpmaker: Ha Ha! So, I'm going to be killed?
Shore Leave: Yep
Dr. Schumpmaker: Ha Ha! and I suppose, what? My men will just fall down dead, and I'll suddenly not want to pull this trigger?
Shore Leave: Mm Hmm.
[Brock lands on/kills the henchman, grabs the Dr.'s gun arm and bends it backwards to point the gun at the Dr.'s own head]
Shore Leave: See? You COULD pull that trigger, but you totally wouldn't wanna.