Seth MacFarlane: Peter Griffin • Brian Griffin • Stewie Griffin • ...
And Then There Were Fewer
Family Guy
Seth MacFarlane credited as playing...
Peter Griffin • Brian Griffin • Stewie Griffin • Glenn Quagmire • Tom Tucker • Dr. Elmer Hartman • Captain Seamus • Willy
- Joe Swanson: The murderer... is one of us!
- [Everybody gasps]
- Joe Swanson: And someone ate the last goat cheese tartlet.
- [Everybody complains]
- Peter Griffin: Now I hope I die next!
- Consuela: [greeting each guest as they walk in the mansion] Meester Peter. Meester Joe. Meester Bonnie.
- Stewie Griffin: She doesn't know what "mister" means.
- Consuela: Meester Mort. Meester Muriel. Mayor West Meester.
- Stewie Griffin: Oh, my God, seriously.
- Stewie Griffin: SPOILER:
- [after Stephanie is killed]
- Stewie Griffin: I can't help but feel this would be sadder if she wasn't so heavy.
- Peter Griffin: Oh, my God! Are those Stephanie's underpants?
- Glen Quagmire: Oh, God.
- Mayor Adam West: They're huge!
- Stewie Griffin: Looks like the crotch got chewed on by a walrus mouth.
- Lois Griffin: Look, it's got flowers! Ha, I mean, why bother? Who's gonna see 'em?
- Mayor Adam West: Maybe someone in space.
- [Everyone starts laughing]
- Glen Quagmire: Come on, guys, can't we all just be glad she's dead?
- Stewie Griffin: There's some poetry to what I do. You know how I would have killed James Woods?
- Brian Griffin: How?
- Stewie Griffin: I would have electrocuted him, causing a temporary paralysis. And while he was still conscious, but unable to move, I would have reached into his anus and pulled out his lower intestine slowly, hand over hand like a fancy magician's scarf trick. Then I would fashion the lower intestine into a crude giraffe and give it to his children as a Christmas morning stocking stuffer. And then, as his eyes start to close in final submission to death's cold embrace, I'd point to the ceiling and say 'is that your card?' And stuck to the ceiling is the card that he'd picked earlier. Oh, I forgot to tell you, he picked a card earlier.