Jesse Eisenberg credited as playing...
- Nick: Now, give me the fucking code.
- Dwayne: Alright. 69-69-69.
- Nick: [pauses] You gotta be fucking kidding me.
- Chet: [gasp as Nick shows the bomb vest] What the fuck? Is that thing real?
- Nick: Chet, if I don't get to the money in time. This thing gonna blow.
- Chet: [angry] And your first thought was to come to a school, filled with young children
- Chet: Okay, climb through the window.
- Nick: You climb through the window!
- Chet: No, I'm holding the bag.
- Nick: I'm holding the bomb!
- [from trailer]
- Nick: [unzips a vest to show a bomb strapped to his chest] Guess what? You just brought a gun to a bombfight, officer!
- Nick: [to Mr. Fisher] Now, listen to me... We're obviously, uh, stealing the car! And you won't report it stolen until later tonight, let's say... 5 o'clock. Or 6, to be safe!
- Chet: 6:15!
- Nick: Yeah, right! 6:15.
- Chet: Don't even bother calling the cops! We own the cops!
- Kate: Why did that engine explode?
- Nick: Remember that bomb I was telling you about? I kind of typed in the code, reactivated it and put in the back of that guy's van.
- Chet: What? That's some John McClane shit! Yes!
- Kate: How did you remember the code?
- Nick: [hesitates] It doesn't matter. We are alive, and we are rich.
- Chet: Okay, what if we saw off both of your arms, slip the vest over your head, than go to the hospital, they'll re-attach your arms. We'll just keep your arms on ice the whole time.
- Nick: Fuck that!
- Chet: I don't know what to do, man. All these sites have different shit. There's not a lot of consensus in the bomb disarming community. What did they do in the Hurt Locker?
- Chet: You wanna fuck my sister?
- Nick: I said your sister was sexually attractive.
- Chet: Uh, my twin sister? Which is basically like fucking me?
- Nick: Remember graduation night?
- Chet: When you were nailing Tina Scotto?
- Nick: Actually, I was having the best night of my life with your sister.
- Nick: [fighting with Chet] You're twins. Did you feel it when I was fucking her?
- Nick: I taught myself how to do this shit. Went online, looked all this up!
- Dwayne: Oh I hear ya. I taught myself how to eat pussy and cut my own hair!
- Kate: You're late.
- Nick: No, no, I'm 45 minutes late, which is, like 10 minutes early for me.
- Chet: [trying to pick out the right toy gun to buy and use in the robbery by practicing with it in the store] EVERYBODY! GET DOWN ON THE GR...
- Nick: Shhh! Jesus!
- Chet: [more quietly] Everybody! Get down on the ground NOW and go get us our money!
- Nick: Uh, how are they supposed to get the money when you just told them...
- Chet: Go get us our money and THEN everybody get down on the ground!
