Roadkill

Six teenagers travel to Ireland in a RV road trip expecting to have fun in their vacation. They stop in a bar and Anita (Roisin Murphy) offers 100 Euros to buy the medal of the gypsy Luca (Ned Dennehy). He accepts the money, but delivers another brooch. The troublemaker Chuck (Diarmuid Noyes) takes the medal from Luca and they flee to the RV. However, they accidentally run down a clairvoyant gypsy that curses them before she dies. Soon they learn that they are chased by the legendary bird Simuroc and by the gypsies that want to retrieve Luca's medal.

"Roadkill" is a dreadful movie with a predictable story that entwines the plots of other teen horror movies in an awful collection of clichés and stereotypical characters. There are dozens of movies showing teenagers in a road trip that goes wrong and a gypsy curse can be seen in "Drag me to Hell" or "Thinner". The giant bird is probably the only "original" part of this movie. What is Stephen Rea doing in this flick? My vote is two.

Title (Brazil): "A Fúria de Simuroc" ("The Anger of Simuroc")

This is a pretty bad movie that is lousy and unwatchable. The story is nothing to special because it's just characters trying to flee from a myth bird. It's interesting they use that type of bird that I never heard of and does give details on what it is. But the movie full of cliches and is easily predictable throughout. The whole curse thing makes no sense because the bird is also after people who have nothing to do with the accident so why include a curse. There's no one to root for in the movie because all of them are pretty bad and aren't that likable at all. The acting itself is pretty bad in this type of movie. This movie is not worth watching.

Roadkill is a telefilm directed by Johannes Roberts and written by Rick Suvalle. It stars Oliver James, Eliza Bennett, Kacey Barnfield, Ned Dennehy, Diarmuid Noyes, Roisin Murphy and Eve Macklin. Music is by Ray Harman and cinematography by Peter Robertson.

A bunch of young friends are travelling around Ireland in an RV when they stop off at a bric-a-brac store. Getting into a dispute with one of the crotchety shop inhabitants, the youths are forced to flee and knock down an old Romany lady with their RV. Whilst trying to aid the old woman, she gasps her last breaths whilst issuing a curse on all involved in her killing…

Once in a while you stumble upon a telefilm that really entertains and holds you for its duration, sadly Roadkill is not one of them. Low expectations always help with these sort of productions, they are after all knocked up by aspiring directors who are just happy to have a film shown on the SyFy channel, but thee's not a lot to write home about here.

In its favour is the appearance of Ned Dennehy, who is always good value for a bit of scuzzy characterisation, and Stephen Rea even pops in for a cameo, but both actors are clearly slumming it and working for food. The group of handsome youngsters are the usual roll call of nice legs, nice cleavage, nice pecs, supplemented by the dim one, the annoying one who says dude a lot and etc, each to be picked off by a rather crummy CGI mythical beast from Sinbad lore.

Will any of them survive? Just what is the secret of the medallion that Dennehy's dirty army are so keen to get back? The answers to these questions will of course provide the backbone of the story, leading to an unintentionally funny moment when "lead girl" turns into Chuck Norris. The acting isn't awful and it's nice to have some genuine Irish countryside as the backdrop to a story set in Ireland, but it all comes off as pointless TV schedule filler. And unadventurous filler at that. 3/10

ROADKILL, a SyFy Channel-style giant monster flick complete with CGI beastie and some horrid acting, offers something a little different for B-movie fans. This one's set in Ireland for a change, and sees a group of American vacationers going on a road trip in their RV (or camper van for Brit viewers) and finding themselves at the mercy of an ancient curse.

It's all preposterous nonsense of course, and the film's cause is little helped by the cheesy, sloppy execution. The writing is equally poor: there's a fairly large cast and yet none of the main characters is in any way memorable or indeed stands out from the pack. When the token black guy shows up you know that the calibre of the writing is sub-par and totally clichéd to say the least.

And yet, and yet...ROADKILL has a certain atmosphere that I found highly charged and plenty of fun. The effects are cheesy, yes, but the giant bird creature is good fun, although more than a little out of place (I'd expect it in an Arabian Nights adventure, not a rural Irish horror). There's plenty of action, and Irish actor Ned Dennehy chews up the scenery with relish as the primary antagonist. Watch out for Stephen Rea's shame-faced cameo as a copper. ROADKILL may not be high art but it does offer plentiful amusement and, for me, that's what counts in a B-movie.

Yeah I gave it 7 of 10, what of it?! I enjoyed this movie the first time SyFy ran it a couple years ago and I've been looking for it ever since. I found it for free today on an online free movie site. (legal) I like B movies IF they are done with decent acting (this was) decent plot without too many holes ((check) and most importantly NO horrible CGI. The CGI in this movie was decently done for what it is and for the budget they probably had to work with. I didn't once roll my eyes at the monster bird. Honestly, who really knows what a truck sized bird would look like in real life? I imagine a bit unreal! I love B movies, I love creature features and I loved this movie. I offer no apologies, it was great!