Vincent D'Onofrio credited as playing...
Alton
- Alton: You calling me a racist?
- Johnson: Well, you don't like black Santa Claus. And last week, you told me you don't like black porno.
- Alton: Now hang on a damn minute. Now that's got nothing to do with racism. I like black chicks in porno movies. I just don't like 'em with the black guys in them, that's all.
- Johnson: Why come? They make you feel inadequate?
- Alton: No. Because their dicks are so dark. They get to fucking, their dicks get wet, they get glisteny and shit, and it's hard for my eyes to unfocus off it. Make me sick.
- Johnson: Eh, well, I guess you got a point.
- [first lines]
- Alton: Need to get the Santa out of here. Number one, it's spring. It's not winter. Spring.
- Johnson: So?
- Alton: Secondly, you don't even work here. When are you gonna stop putting all your shit all around all over the place? Third..
- Johnson: Mm-hmm.
- Alton: Santa Claus ain't even of African descent.
- Johnson: Oh, yeah, that's it there. I was waiting for that. You do realize Santa Claus ain't even a real person. You can make him whatever color you want to.