Mercenaries

Dreadful Film! OK, many people have already referred to the fact that this is such a dreadful film already. The biggest problem is that if you combine terrible acting with a terrible script then the only sure fire thing you are going to get is a terrible film. It's all just so implausible that a group of amateurs who clearly have not bothered to get any military adviser on board start running round someone's back garden to convince the viewer that they are on some kind of clandestine rescue mission. Mr Fuccilla is clearly no leading man and is unable to carry a gun properly, never mind a movie. His dialog is simply risible.

Does the movie have any redeeming features? Critics, even the hard- nosed ones, will try and find at least one redeeming factor but alas, in this case, it seems to be impossible. It seems that the key to this movie lies in its funding. If you read the PR suicide article on Mr Fuccilla in the Guardian you can see that this is another vanity project. The Merchant Banker might do better spending the money on acting lessons.

In the end, the poster tells it all: on IMDb we see Fuccilla face on in big close up. By the time the movie is released we see the DVD cover with everyone with their backs to us. If the Merchant Banker at the head of the vanity project turns his back on his own film - it's time for the viewer to do the same!

Rather than watching this film, I felt as if i was being subjected to it. I have seen thousands of film, both high and low budget, and I can quite honestly say this is one of the worst I have watched. The only thing more terrible than the script were the actors' performances. Although, the actors aren't fully to blame as the casting choices were the true root cause of the film's problems. Not one character was believable as having served in the SAS or any military unit, they couldn't properly hold weapons or implement any semblance of military tactics.Beside from the countless military inaccuracies; the plot was unoriginal, unbelievable and totally boring.

Avoid this movie, it is absolute rubbish!

I am a film reviewer so frankly I don't care that the lead actor, Mr Fucilla, is, according to the Guardian newspaper, a merchant banker who believes he can bypass training as an actor and has bought bought his way into a project. I don't care that the director was a unit driver called Barry Leonti (according to IMDb) and reinvented himself as a director, called Paris. I don't care about the fact that MERCENARIES advertises itself (on Wikipedia) as being shown at the Cannes Film Festival in 2011 when it wasn't (I was there and there is no official record of it in any competition). What I care about is what I see when I pay my money and watch what is on the big or small screen in front of me. And unfortunately, in this case, it would not be an exaggeration to say it is an absolutely unwatchable mish mash mess. The starting problem is the fact that no attempt has been made to put it in the right geographical setting. Even low budget films need to make an effort, though. Srebenica? This has clearly been set in the local park. This in itself is bad but when you throw a clearly unconsidered plot and script in to the mix then you have problems. Derivative, would be putting it mildly. Where is there any attempt at being original. Low budget is no excuse for making no effort. Quite the opposite - it is the absolute opportunity to do something original. Clearly, Billy Zane, sticks out like a sore thumb, bring the pay check face on the DVD cover (though, as many reviewers have pointed out - even he has disowned the film by refusing to be on the DVD cover). The dialogue just seems to have been thrown together and the acting is a mix of amateurism and half-heartedness - it's difficult to tell what could have been made of this if the script had not been so bad.

Ultimately it is a sad old mess and reflects really badly on the struggling UK film industry. This is not what is needed in the industry, it will just drive investors further away from investing in films. What a sad, missed opportunity. Let's hope this film can be quietly forgotten and the UK film industry can provide us with some low budget, quality, original films again.

So .. the American military (ie Billy Zane) entrust the rescue of a US ambassador somewhere in Serbia (where else !) to a rag bag of British mercenaries (we mustn't forget the word "elite" here !) led by an investment manager from Brixton , London !

They walk around somewhere in a wooded area at night talking loudly ... knowing that only the cameraman and soundman are listening .

We know who the top bad guy is because he wears an eye patch , of course ! More walking in illuminated woods at night follows , while the bad guys are torturing everyone they can find !!

Now this is where it gets exciting ... the investment manager (turned actor / cameraman & producer) from Brixton , decides to attack the bad guys , based in a shabby building ... not to be confused with the American Embassy say , and liberate the hostages . Armed only with Kalashnikovs (don't ask !) the good guys liberate the American hostages including the one-eyed bandit.

Here , excitement reaches a zenith ! After firing many blank bullets and more flashing lights , the liberators go back to the woods with the Americans and a captured bad guy ! Surprisingly, the woods are very well lit .

Anyway , the producer / actor investment manager tries to hit on the only female with them . But eventually Billy Zane is there with the obligatory coffee to welcome what is left of the rescuers !

There is a lot of trees in this film , but little daylight.

Breathtaking , don't yo think ??

I am about 5 minutes into the movie and very disappointed... First of all you have a Full Bird Col. wearing the uniform all wrong. Then people calling him Colonal... You don't call them by their rank.. Sir... Ma'am.. Then went even further with the Major wearing his head gear inside, and then someone calling a soldier they worked with private. So aside from everyone being all jacked up.. and people getting called by rank this movies script is lacking too. The president is under attack and doesn't realize until they get to his house?? Then they say they have to leave quickly but get caught at the top of their stairs waiting... Who does that? This isn't one of them scary movie plots where the girl runs up the stairs instead of out the door. there is my ten lines.