Major League of Extraordinary Gentlemen

Marc Summers: Welcome back to "Unwrapped". You know, nearly everyone has enjoyed an ice cream sundae on a hot day, but the origins of this tasty treat may just surprise you. It's commonly accepted that the sundae was invented in Evanston, Illinois, circa 1890. We went to Dr. Peter Yarbrough for the real scoop.

Dr. Peter Yarbrough: Here's how fucking dumb these fuckheads in Illinois were. The ice cream soda had just been invented; teenagers liked them. So these fucking religious numbnuts sat around jacking off in church all day thinking about how much they just hated teenagers, and decided - true fucking story, people - that God therefore must hate ice cream sodas. That's right! These Illinois fucknuts concluded that God, creator of the infinite universe who probably had a trillion fucking better things to do, actually had an opinion about motherfucking ice cream sodas! So the state of Illinois banned ice cream sodas on Sundays. You know, so I guess God wouldn't make it rain crickets or some ridiculous fucking horseshit! Long story short, every Sunday, the fucking ice cream stores, they'd just - ta-da! - they'd just leave out the soda part! And these Illinois fucks, they just sat around, jacked off, thinking about how much they had pleased their invisible master who lives on a fucking flying cloud, or wherever the fuck he lives! That's how ice cream sundaes were invented - dumb fucking Illinois assholes!

Marc Summers: Up next... Skittles!

Dr. Peter Yarbrough: Oh, fucking Skittles!