Jane Seymour credited as playing...
Mrs. Wattlesbrook
- Miss Elizabeth Charming: [during the "theatrical"] l am Aphrodite, the goddess. Often fickle in my large arse.
- Mrs. Wattlesbrook: Largesse.
- Miss Elizabeth Charming: Largesse.
- [first lines]
- Mrs. Wattlesbrook: What separates the casual Jane Austen fan from the aficionado? Is it her admiration for the style and manners of the Regency era? The number of times she has read Austen's novels? Or her consuming love for Mr. Darcy?
- Mrs. Wattlesbrook: All of my guests will experience romance with one of our actors. But I must emphasize there is to be no touching other than the necessary social graces.
- Jane Hayes: I only really know one song.
- Colonel Andrews: Play that one then.
- Mrs. Wattlesbrook: Not surprising.
- Jane Hayes: So I'll just play that.
- [singing]
- Jane Hayes: It's getting hot in here, So take off all your clothes, I am - getting so hot, I'm gonna take my clothes off...
- Mrs. Wattlesbrook: Ladies, please join me in the parlor for my lecture series on bonnets, bosoms and vices.