Seth Rogen: Mantis

Kung Fu Panda 3

Mantis

Mantis: [they stand outside a ship run aground in a desert after Masters Bear and Croc ran in] We gotta get in there.
Crane: But Master Shifu said...
Mantis: You're seriously afraid? Even Master Chicken's going in, and he's a *chicken*!

Crane: [Crane is flying, with Mantis on his hat] Wings of surveillance!
Mantis: Why do you do that?
Crane: Do what?
Mantis: Just 'cause you say "wings of" before something, it doesn't mean that you're doing a special move. It's like me saying "antenna of power!" or "thorax of... making sandwiches!"
Crane: Wings of disagreement.

Crane: Master, what are we going to do?
Shifu: *You* are going to find out where Kai is. Follow the trail of those jade creatures but do not engage For with every foe he faces Kai becomes stronger.
Crane: Why me? Is it because I asked?
Shifu: No. It is because you can fly. Go!
Mantis: Should have kept your beak shut!
Shifu: And take Mantis.
Mantis: What? Oh man, is it because I...
Shifu: Yes.

Mantis: [as he is turned into a jade zombie] Antenna of Power! Agh, it didn't work!

Viper: [returns to normal] We're back!
Monkey: Bestie!
Mantis: I'm still green! It didn't work! Oh, wait. That's my normal green.
Lei Lei: [grabs Mantis, makes him do "kissy face" with Po's Tigress action figure] Greenie baby!
Mantis: Not a baby! Not a baby! Antenna of Fear!

Shifu: Today, will be my final class.
[Po and the Five become worried]
Po: Your final?... Wait, I didn't know you were sick.
[looks at Shifu's eyes]
Po: Although, you have been looking a little...
Shifu: [pushes Po away with his staff] I'm not sick!
Po: Healthy. A little healthy. A lot actually.
Shifu: My final class because from now on, your training will be in the hands of the Dragon Warrior.
[points his staff toward Po]
Po: [nods and smiles for once, then his face turns frightful in realization] *WHAT*?
[knocks Shifu back with his voice and steps close to Shifu]
Po: Me? Teach? I mean, why not Tigress? She's always telling everyone what to do.
Tigress: Be quiet, Po.
Po: See what I mean?
Shifu: Tigress is not the Dragon Warrior. You are.
Po: Come on, they're the Five! What can I teach them?
Shifu: [reappears behind Po] There is always something more to learn, even for a master. For instance, let me show you another move...
[twirls his staff]
Shifu: The dramatic exit.
[points his staff at the roof]
Shifu: What's that?
[quickly leaves the room and closes the door]
Po: Whoa! Are you kidding me? That... What? Where'd he go?
Tigress, Monkey, Mantis, Viper, Crane: [bowing down in unison] Master.
Po: [chuckles] He's gone guys. It's cool.
Monkey: We await your instruction, Master.
Tigress: All you have to lose... is our respect.
Mantis: [walks up to Po's shoulder] Seriously, how bad could it be?
[the scene cuts to chaos in the Training Hall]
Mantis: Very bad! Very, very bad!

Po: Guys guys, you're never gonna guess who just showed up. Not in a million years. You can't... you just try...
[Li lifts his helmet slightly]
Tigress, Monkey, Crane, Viper, Mantis, Shifu: [in unison] Your father!
Po: Whoa, how did you just guess that? Oh, wait a second. Yeah, of course. We look exactly the same. Dad, say hi to my friends. Mantis, Tigress, Monkey, Crane and Viper.
Li: [shook Monkey's hand] Oh, Viper, was it?
Monkey: Monkey, sir.
Po: They're kinda my best friends. And this... this is Master Shifu. Legend!
Shifu: It is an honor to meet you, Master Panda.
[to Po]
Shifu: Perhaps your father would care to join us in the training hall?
[to Li]
Shifu: Your son will be teaching the class.
[Monkey, Viper, Mantis, and Crane cringe]
Li: Oh ho!
Po: I'm sure he's tired. I'm sure you're tired. He's tired. I'm gonna show him to the Chrysanthemum Suite.
Li: What, tired? No, I'm fine. I would love to watch you teach.
Po: Trust me. It would be more fun to watch me...
[the bell tower suddenly rings]
Po: Fight!