Rise of the Dinosaurs

I think my review title sums it up. It's very watchable, this story of soldiers against dangerous Jurassic beasts.

But it's very stupid. The dialog is corny and it's quite contrived.

The worst and stupidest part of the stupidity is the characters. The "bad guy doing good things" is a cliche that you don't want to try to believe in real life. A human monster doesn't do "nice". The motivations here are even more unbelievable than the rest of it, which says a lot.

The only characters with any possible believable motivation are the minor characters who get scratched out of existence. That's another Hollywood cliche, the sermon about "hey, we'll kill anyone you can relate to, just to keep you depressed, nyah, nyah".

However, it is watchable in a sort of "so bad it's good sort of way".

When their mission to capture a renegade general and a kidnapped scientist goes awry, a team of soldiers learn they've stumbled onto an ancient valley filled with live dinosaurs and must try to get away before they all fall victim to the creatures.

This turned out to be quite an enjoyable effort that could be fun once it overlooked the cheesiness. There's a huge amount of that spread throughout here, once again featured from the absolutely atrocious and ridiculous CGI used for the dinosaurs that don't have any sort of consistent movement beyond three general attack behaviors throughout as well as the constant size discrepancies in the scenes and totally ridiculous-looking animation effects for the attacks. While these look really bad, and there's a couple problematic story lines in play that don't make any sort of sense at all, there's some fun here with a lot more action than expected, including a rather fun takeover of the rebel hideout in the jungle which devolves into a series of fun firefights that are pretty enjoyable. As well, with the creatures continuously on the group that leaves for plenty of high-quality confrontations and kill scenes to make up for it's shortcomings. Overall, this one wasn't too bad even with a few flaws.

Rated Unrated/R: Graphic Violence and Language.

I think as a teenager I might have thought this was quite fun to watch I reckon. I can't say for sure, but I did like the mercenaries on an ... well adventure sort of thing. Which is what is going on here in some way, shape or form.

The Dinosaurs are really bad CGI .. I mean there may be worse CGI out there, but I doubt you will care. Unless you consider the budget this was made on. We have a former Mad Max actor in this, which may excite you or not. You may also care that there are actually some small/minor acting moments - genuine moments that is. Of course mostly, this is not about the acting, but about seeing the big animals roam the screen and the mayhem they cause.

The special effects (not CGI) are not that bad actually - again considering the budget and all that. Overall this will not find too many who will actually care.

Rise of the Dinosaurs (2013)

1/2 (out of 4)

A special units squad is sent into a jungle to rescue a female hostage but on their way back the helicopter they're riding in crashes. Soon the group realize that their in a mysterious land where dinosaurs still rule and like the taste of human flesh. Originally titled JURASSIC ATTACK, it's clear that this film was simply made so it could cash in on the re-release of Steven Spielberg's JURASSIC PARK but there's no question which is the better picture. Sadly this here is so bad that even a company like The Asylum would be embarrassed by it. There's really nothing here that would make the viewer think that anyone involved with the picture had any intention of making it good. The CGI effects are beyond horrible but I'm sure most are expecting this. It's strange that no matter what type of dinosaur we're looking at they're always pretty much the same size. Just take a look at one awful scene where a dinosaur eats a man and just wait till you see how much blood comes pouring out of its mouth. If the CGI dinosaur looks back what's even worse is the horrid blood coming from its mouth. There's really no drama, no adventure, no laughs, no shocks or anything else that you might expect in a film like this. It's clearly just a rip-off of THE LAND THAT TIME FORGET, which its author gets a mention here. There's even a joke aimed at the Spielberg movie but I'm going to guess that most would have hit the stop button by then. Usually these types of movies can reach a so bad it's good level but this here never comes close to that. The best advice is to just stay away or at least not watch it until dinosaurs are walking the Earth again.

Truth be told, when I sat down here in 2025 to watch the 2013 movie "Jurassic Attack", or "Rise of the Dinosaurs" as it was titled on the version I stumbled upon, then I wasn't exactly harboring the biggest of expectations. The whole thing just reeked of low budget cash-in on the success of the "Jurassic Park" movies.

Writer Rafael Jordan put together a rather generic and formulaic script and storyline. This was essentially a no-brainer, so just lean back and watch the questionable effects as the story unfolds.

Of the entire cast ensemble, I was only familiar with Gary Stretch, Corin Nemec and Vernon Wells. The acting performances in the movie were actually bad, which counted for something.

As expected, the CGI animated dinosaurs in the movie were pretty terrible to look at. Well, actually all the effects in the movie were questionable, especially the CGI.

Highly forgettable, "Jurassic Attack" is the type of movie you watch once and never again, provided you even opt to watch it to begin with. "Jurassic Attack" is every bit as questionable and laughable as you would think it to be.

My rating of director Anthony Fankhauser's 2013 movie "Jurassic Attack" lands on a generous two out of ten stars.