The War I Knew

The British paratroopers are shown firing M-1s and Thompson machine guns. They would have been carrying the Enfield rifle and Sten machine gun.

After a few days of watching back to back WW1 and WW2 films both blockbuster and independent, I eventually got down my list to The War I Knew.

I wish I never knew this film existed!

From the very start the script and acting are cheesy, wooden and what you'd expect from a high school drama group, and a bad one at that.

I'm not even being picky about the uniforms, weapons or the landscape chosen for the filming. I'll give them some slack on that front as these things cost money. But to get the colour or consistency of blood is one of the easiest and cheapest things to do, I'll give you a head start! it's not one shade of pink or looks like coloured water.

The acting and the script come across as a mixture of a really bad episode of Dad's Army meets a Carry On film and then all of a sudden they try acting with some seriousness and grit...to be honest, I've felt more real emotion from a episode of the teletubbies when there's no tubby toast.

If they intended to show respect to those who fought in the war then they did the complete opposite. No group of soldiers, behind enemy lines would jump up in the air shouting and whooping, high fiving each other after shooting a German soldier.

This should really be in a spoof comedy genre just so viewers know to avoid it.

Poor movie, none of the surrounds look like France, only of England. Also very poor acting. What is appalling is at the end it mentions Johnny Barrows received a Victoria Cross for his bravery. This is an insult for the real hero's that earn't the VC during wartime. The producers should face legal action for this insult!!

I love a good war movie but unfortunately this isn't one.

From the opening sequence's where the British "Para's" are about to make a suicidal attack I could tell this was a poorly researched piece of film. The whole production is full of glaring historical mistakes that set the film up to be a massive failure.

British Paratroopers wearing R.E.M.E blouses, brodie helmets and using American issued rifles.... 5 minutes on Wikipedia could have saved this productions team some embarrassment and myself 15 minutes of my life I can never get back.

1/10

This is one of those films that is hard to describe without employing inventive expletives of the most Anglo Saxon nature. However, I shall try – the synopsis is a British paratroop squad are dropped miles from their drop off point and all but one are wiped out and then the sole survivor, Jonny, has to get back to his lines and grow a pair etc.

Now the mistakes pile up faster than an Enron executive planning excuses. He stops to bury the dead, carries a Luger (that always goes down well if one is captured) and wanders about in the 'French' countryside in the total open. Then he meets some other lost solders and they have some unconvincing and lack lustre japes in the Lancashire countryside. Yes that is where this guffathon was filmed North England which surprisingly does not make a good double for Normandy.

The special effects are excruciatingly bad. Some of the acting raises a smile but to be extremely fair there are some reasonable performances here ostensibly from Paul Harrison as Jonny, James Boyland as Murphy (don't even get me started on the gay sub plot though) and the American Adam Woodward. Others are less convincing but I think that is mostly because the script is soo contemptibly awful. Language often used is of a modern vocabulary and seems totally incongruous for some Brit Tommies in WW2.

It was originally called 'The War I Knew' and is based on actual 'accounts' what are they then? I think it must be that some men dressed up and did some fighting ? Am I even close – well we will never know as these priceless sources are yet to be revealed. I tried to find some positives and apart from the acting – in places – the only other one I can think of is that this is easy to watch on fast forward as you will miss nothing. Not the worst war film ever but one that should be given very serious consideration – avoid like a drunken dance off in a mine field.