The Thingy: Confessions of a Teenage Placenta

The Thingy: Confessions of a Teenage Placenta (AKA The Miracle of Life) is proof that I will watch absolutely anything. It's definitely one of the weirdest movies to be released by Troma, and that's saying something.

Starting as it means to go on (in full-on bonkers mode), the film opens with a female body builder Marianne (played a man, Pascal Maetens) giving birth in the gym. For some reason I can't quite fathom, the baby is put in a plastic bag and discarded, and the placenta is presented to the proud mother, who promptly holds the fleshy protein sac to her breast for feeding. So far, so freaky.

Years pass, and the placenta, named Luke, attends school, but finds it hard to fit in with his peers. As a teenager, he develops an interest in the opposite sex, falling for classmate Rihanna (Sofie Hoflack). When a date with the girl doesn't go as he had hoped, Marianne hires a prostitute, Angie (Celine Verbeeck), to satisfy her son's carnal urges (she strokes his umbilical cord), after which (again for reasons I cannot fathom) Luke takes a gun and goes on a killing spree.

Even more bizarre than the title suggests, The Thingy throws up one 'WTF?' moment after another, making it a genuine one-of-a-kind experience: Marianne only exercises one arm, the right bulging with muscles, the left comparatively skinny; in one scene, the fish on Marianne's wallpaper momentarily come to life and swim about; another freakish moment sees Marianne breastfeeding the pet dog; and there's a brief, trippy animated sequence that bears no relation to the rest of the film.

As far as the central character is concerned, Luke the Placenta is a rubbery blob with very little movement, a creation that makes Belial from Basket Case look like a marvel of special effects by comparison; however, one can't help but feel for the little guy, at least until he goes on his bloody rampage, shooting his mother and seven defenceless infants in a maternity ward. Naughty Luke!

The film closes with Luke confiding in his priest godfather Julio (Karel Vingerhoets), who cooks his godson and eats him—a demented finish to a thoroughly messed up movie.

5/10—difficult to recommend to most movie fans but unmissable for those who deliberately seek out cinematic oddities.

but that's not saying much.... i just discovered this modern psychtronic flick recently and it deserves way more than one review.

What i like most is that the novel concept of the afterbirth monster doesn't get wasted on a cheap plot where the creature breaks loose to go on a killing spree. Don't expect any police procedural and showering girls getting strangled by umilacal cords or anything like that. The film aimed for something more unique and sincere.... Like a larger than life biopic, like the title suggests. Yea sure, it remains pretty sleazy at all times. But it's nevertheless got a strange kind of depth and emotion to it.

I watched it with some friends who are younger than me. we laughed on the same moments and got completely silent on the same moments. highly recommended. 9IF you can track it down

Only put this on because I was curious to see what a teenage placenta looks like, but boy what an unexpected treat. Took me back to years ago when I loved to get drunk, then smoke a little salvia - just enough to feel the electricity flowing through my arms out of my fingertips and get a bad case of rhyming word garble. I'd wind up passing out drunk and have freaky dreams I could barely remember the next day. This gem is like one of those dreams was captured on film so I could enjoy it in sobriety. The level of detail is amazing. I kept pausing so I could look at all the stuff in the background. Could probably watch it twenty times and keep finding things I never noticed before. The camera work is fantastic. It's well written, the characters are thoughtfully fleshed out, and the acting matches the dialog. At first it reminded me of John Waters' early films, but overall the tone is much darker. This is not really a comedy, it's just so weird and sick you may laugh in discomfort. Possibly the most bizarre film I've ever seen that still manages to have a coherent plot. Will definitely have my eye out for future works by Joel Rabijns and Yves Sondermeier.

What a mish-mash of insane thoughts must have bounced across the synapses of those who wrote this trash. It has no redeeming qualities and serves as a testament to the debased culture in which we now live. It can only live on in the minds of those who do serious drugs of many colors.

I don't even know what to say. Would probably be a good movie to watch while your high. But overall, this movie is absolutely terrible.