Allison Janney credited as playing...
- Violet: [in her room] Dammit dammit dammit!
- Christy: What's that?
- Bonnie: She's 17 and pregnant, I'm surprised it's not happening all day.
- Marjorie: [Christy sneezes] Oh dear, are you allergic to cats?
- Christy: [congested voice] A little.
- Bonnie: Since when?
- Christy: [looks at her] Since *birth*, Mom.
- Bonnie: Gummy double D's and a curly blonde wig, you could actually have a chance of getting laid, by a man!
- Marjorie: What are gummy bear breasts?
- Bonnie: The latest in plastic surgery. It's like memory foam, with nipples!
- Marjorie: I don't want anyone else to know about this.
- Christy: Why not?
- Marjorie: I don't want them feeling sorry for me because I'm sick.
- Bonnie: They don't, they feel sorry for you because you're a crazy cat lady!
- Bonnie: [sees Marjorie has a house full of cats] Oh Marjorie, when did you lose your way?
- Bonnie: Hey look, Angelina Jolie's new breasts. Life gave her lemons, she turned them into grapefruits.
- Bonnie: So what's your plan for the baldness?
- Marjorie: They said that might not happen.
- Bonnie: Oh it's happening, you're gonna look like a thumb in a housecoat.
- Christy: [driving home from the bistro] I can't believe that about Marjorie.
- Bonnie: I know. She doesn't look sick.
- Christy: Well, she did order soup, and that is the official dish of sick people.
- Bonnie: You think she's faking it?
- Christy: Who fakes having cancer?
- Bonnie: I did once. I was dating this guy and I didn't want to hurt his feelings. Two years later I run into him at a Costco and tried to pass it off as 'It's a miracle!'
- Christy: Who'd think that'd blow up in your face?
- Bonnie: I know, I never go to Costco!
