Casey Sander credited as playing...
Mike Rostenkowski
- Mr. Rostenkowski: I don't know what's scarier: the bathroom clowns or the woman that put 'em there.
- Sheldon Cooper: All I know is you can only fit one of her in a car.
- [Howard enters from the kitchen]
- Sheldon Cooper: And there's the clown that came out of her.
- [Howard turns right around and goes back in the kitchen]
- Mr. Rostenkowski: So is your dad still living in Texas?
- Sheldon Cooper: No, sir. He died when I was fourteen.
- Mr. Rostenkowski: I'm sorry to hear that.
- Sheldon Cooper: So was the guy who ran the liquor store. He cried and cried.
- Mr. Rostenkowski: What's wrong with your mother?
- Howard Wolowitz: Oh, her gout's acting up. Turns out an apple pie a day does not keep the doctor away.
- Mrs. Wolowitz: How can one little toe hurt so bad?
- Howard Wolowitz: Maybe because that little piggy is being *crushed by the barn!*
- Mr. Rostenkowski: I've kept a marriage together for 35 years. Can I weigh in here?
- Leonard Hofstadter: Sure.
- Mr. Rostenkowski: I'm trying to watch the game. Shut up.
- Sheldon Cooper: [belching] ... 2,3,8,4,6...
- [then quickly covers his mouth]
- Sheldon Cooper: That's as far as I can get without throwing up.
- Mr. Rostenkowski: [laughing] Well, that's not what was I was thinking when you told me you could burp *pie*.
- Mrs. Wolowitz: Did somebody say pie?
- Mr. Rostenkowski: Do you remember the Thanksgiving game when it snowed in Dallas?
- Sheldon Cooper: 1993. Leon Lett blew the game in the final seconds and the Dolphins emerged victorious. Then I finally got to do my calculus.
- Mr. Rostenkowski: I was so pissed, I wanted to shoot my TV.
- Sheldon Cooper: So was my dad. And then he did.
- Mr. Rostenkowski: So if your dad died when you were 14, you were never old enough to have a beer with the man.
- Sheldon Cooper: No sir. He did try to give me one for my high school graduation, but I was eleven and my mom said no.
- Mr. Rostenkowski: I know I'm hard on you, but you're not the worst son-in-law in the world.
- Howard Wolowitz: Mike, that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
- Mr. Rostenkowski: Well, I'm drunk.