Jared Padalecki credited as playing...
Sam Winchester
- Dean Winchester: [Sam hands him a coffee cup] Real men don't drink out of cups this small.
- [Sniffs it]
- Dean Winchester: What is that -- "cinnamon roll"?
- Sam Winchester: It's, uh, "glazed donut."
- Sam Winchester: How did Bobby know an heiress?
- Dean Winchester: Bobby had secrets, man. Like loving on Tori Spelling. If he only knew Dean cheated on her.
- Sam Winchester: "Grey gardens" cleared.
- Dean Winchester: Okay, well, so is Dash and Amber. They're a thing, by the way.
- Sam Winchester: Yeah?
- Dean Winchester: Yeah.
- [Shakes head]
- Dean Winchester: W.A.S.P.S.
- Sam Winchester: Got to say, for a family that just lost two members, you all... seem fine.
- Dash: Well, Sam, I'll let you in on a little family secret.
- [Whispers]
- Dash: We don't really like each other.
- [Chuckles]
- Dash: Then again, what family does?
- Sam Winchester: Mine does. Uh, for the most part. It's just my brother and me, so...
- Dash: Then you're lucky. Trust me; t's a miracle we've been under the same roof for 24 hours and haven't---
- [Realizes he was about to say "murder"]
- Dash: Oops.
- Beverly: Well, well, well what do we have here? What'cha doing snooping these halls? Up to no good?
- [Flirty]
- Beverly: Why don't we get up to no good together? You know they say women just get better with age, like a fine wine or a cheese.
- Sam Winchester: [Awkwardly] I-I, um, I'm lactose intolerant.
- Dean Winchester: Any leads on the scanner or the Interweb?
- Sam Winchester: Nothing. Not even a cat up a tree.
- Dean Winchester: So right when we're ready to jump back into it, it, goes radio silence.
- Sam Winchester: Murphy's law.
- Dean Winchester: Well, Murphy's a douche.
- Sam Winchester: Wow, think we're a little under dressed? I mean the fed threads are in the trunk.
- Dean Winchester: Are you kidding me, for once we don't have to wear suits. You're lucky my waistband is not elastic.
- Sam Winchester: What are you doing?
- Heddy: Trying to find Beverly a man.
- Beverly: I've resorted to fishing online because the live ones won't bite.
- Dean Winchester: We're dealing with two vengeful spirits. Apparently, Aunt Bunny had a bee in her bonnet, as well.
- Sam Winchester: Husband-and-wife tag-team killer ghosts?
- Dean Winchester: Well, got to keep the marriage alive somehow.
- Dean Winchester: "Charmed, I'm sure." What are these people?
- Sam Winchester: I think they're called W.A.S.P.S.
- Dean Winchester: What?
- Sam Winchester: So, the shifter's getting its jollies by impersonating dead people
- Dean Winchester: Yeah. First Bunny, then Lance, now Phillip. Guess we can rule out "the Butler did it."
- Dean Winchester: "Made in Taiwan." freakin' stainless steel.
- Sam Winchester: So that's why no one sizzled? They're not even real silver?
- Dean Winchester: [sighs] First, cubic zirconium, and now this. No wonder the rich stay rich.
- Olivia: Allow me to introduce Sam and Dean Winchester.
- Heddy: Sam and Dean Winchester of the Westchester Winchesters?
- Sam Winchester: Uh, no. I don't think there's any relation. Sorry.
- Heddy: No matter. You two are...
- [Inhales sharply]
- Heddy: ... Adorable.
- Sam Winchester: Olivia, you don't have to do this, being a monster is a choice.
- Olivia: That choice was made for me a long time ago.
- Olivia: Why do you need the silverware?
- Sam Winchester: For protection.
- Olivia: Butter knives?
- Dean Winchester: Trust us, there's a method to our madness.