Constable Henry Higgins: You can have Hendrickson; he lives almost ten miles out of town
Constable George Crabtree: Oh, I'm aware of that.
Constable Henry Higgins: Then why would you volunteer?
Constable George Crabtree: Because he lives right next to Mrs. Hempshire's Finishing School.
Constable Henry Higgins: Mary Lawrence went there.
Constable George Crabtree: Did she?
Constable Henry Higgins: For a time. She left; she said the women there were of easy virtue.
Constable George Crabtree: Oh, indeed? And if I recall correctly, today's laundry day. I remember once Jackson and I had to reprimand a couple of them for wandering around in their unmentionables.
Constable Henry Higgins: Did you?
Constable George Crabtree: Yes, and they were from France. The, the unmentionables, Parisian undergarments.
Constable Henry Higgins: Well, allow me to save you the trip.
Constable George Crabtree: Hmh?
Constable Henry Higgins: I could use a brisk bicycle ride.
[Higgins leaves]
Mark Twain: It's a shame... you don't have a fence that needs paintin'.
Constable George Crabtree: That was last summer, sir.
