William Jackson Harper credited as playing...
Chidi Anagonye
- Eleanor Shellstrop: Is your name Chidi?
- Chidi Anagonye: Yes?
- Eleanor Shellstrop: Ah! I knew you weren't a soup.
- Chidi Anagonye: Okay, so if we got all the way to Scanlon, we must have been studying very intensely for a very long time. Or you grabbed a random book of mine and just tore a page out.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: I'm gonna be honest - that sounds more like me.
- Michael: Eleanor Shellstrop, you sneaky little so-and-so. That was some quick thinking. I'm extremely impressed. And to be honest, I'm relieved. At least there's an explanation for why this all went south so fast. But you're not gonna be so lucky next time.
- Tahani Al-Jamil: Next time?
- Chidi Anagonye: What?
- Michael: Yeah.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: He's gonna do it again.
- [she crumples up the note and puts it in her mouth]
- Michael: That's not gonna work this time, dummy.
- Chidi Anagonye: So, making decisions isn't necessarily my strong suit.
- Michael: I know that, buddy. You-you once had a panic attack at a make-your-own sundae bar.
- Chidi Anagonye: There were too many toppings, and very early in the process, you had to commit to a chocolate palette or a fruit palette. And if you couldn't decide, you wound up with kiwi-Junior Mint-raisin, and it just ruins everyone's night.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: Are you gonna talk or just walk around like a nerd trying to get a personal best on his Fitbit?
- Chidi Anagonye: I'm sorry. I'm trying to process a tremendous amount of insane information. I mean, you're not supposed to be here. But you and I clearly met here somehow before now. I mean... does that mean that I'm not supposed to be here?
- Eleanor Shellstrop: I don't know, dude. Were you a good person on Earth?
- Chidi Anagonye: Well, I-I think so. I spent my life in pursuit of fundamental truths about the univ...
- [Gasps]
- Chidi Anagonye: Oh, no! I used almond milk in my coffee, even though I knew about the negative environmental impact.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: What?
- Chidi Anagonye: Eleanor, what do we do?
- Eleanor Shellstrop: I don't know, dude! But we better figure it out soon or we're doomed.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: When I got here, some robot lady appeared out of thin air and gave me this.
- [Shows him the note]
- Chidi Anagonye: You mean Janet.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: Oh! That's it. Janet.
- Janet: [appearing] Hi, there.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: Not now, Janet. Buzz off.
- Janet: Okay.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: Now, I have no memory of writing this, but it is my handwriting. And that's your name, right? So, for some reason, at some point, I put this note into... that whatever-lady's robot mouth.
- Chidi Anagonye: You already forgot her name.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: No, I didn't. Her name is... Janet.
- Janet: [appearing again] Hi, there.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: [gasping in surprise] Fork off.
- Chidi Anagonye: I know that book.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: Is that some kind of nerd pick-up line? Because it's only kind of working.
- Chidi Anagonye: No. The-the note you showed me before?
- [she takes the note out]
- Chidi Anagonye: Right, this is from a book called "What We Owe to Each Other". I used to teach it. I was a professor of ethics and moral philosophy.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: All right, brag much?
- Chidi Anagonye: No, I'm trying to help you.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: Sorry. Okay.
- Chidi Anagonye: I have never seen you before in my life, but I think, somehow, that we know each other.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: That definitely sounded like a pickup line, and I'm not not interested, but we need to figure this out first.