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Timothy Olyphant and Liv Hewson in Santa Clarita Diet (2017)

Timothy Olyphant: Joel Hammond

No Family Is Perfect

Santa Clarita Diet

Timothy Olyphant credited as playing...

Joel Hammond

Photos20

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+ 10
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Quotes3

  • Joel Hammond: Hello. I purchased a foot here two weeks ago.
  • Orderly Barton: Yeah, sure, I remember. How'd that work out for you?
  • Joel Hammond: Excellent. Thank you. I'm looking for something very specific.
  • Orderly Barton: I have a vagina I can sell you for 500. It's a little past its "best-use-by" date, but it'll get 'er done.
  • Joel Hammond: Dear God! Who comes here?
  • Orderly Barton: Brace yourself: mostly men.
  • Joel Hammond: I need a fresh gallbladder, but it has to be from someone who's Serbian.
  • Orderly Barton: God, what are you into? I love it. Come on in. Let's take a look around, you sick fuck.
  • Joel Hammond: When I was at the asylum...
  • Abby Hammond: Don't say "asylum." It sounds like they sent you to the 19th century.
  • Joel Hammond: OK. When I was at the "time-out" resort...
  • Joel Hammond: Our kitchen looks like the inside of a shark.
  • Sheila Hammond: Well, I admit it went on a little longer than necessary... and then 10 minutes after that.

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