Sara Rue credited as playing...
Olivia Caliban
- Librarian: [Fortune-Telling] You... I don't know. There's just a lot going on here.
- Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender: That's fair.
- Librarian: You have set fire after fire, but it's never enough, for time flies like a poison dart, and the force of destiny cages us all.
- Esmé Squalor: I always thought crystal balls were as fake as those eyelashes.
- Librarian: No, no, no, they are as real as the jewels on your teeny-tiny engagement ring.
- Librarian: Once a day, when spirits call, you may ask one question of the ball. And then spirits come in smoke and fire to answer you your heart's desire.
- Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender: That seems plausible.
- Librarian: You have questions for Madame Lulu?
- Count Olaf: Of course they don't have any questions. They're lucky to have the work. Without this carnival, they would just be working in human resources with the rest of the freaks.
- Librarian: You report to House of Freaks, where work accommodations will be provided. Also, health insurance, although nearby hospital is... How you say...
- Count Olaf: Burned down?
- Librarian: Out of network.