William Jackson Harper credited as playing...
Chidi Anagonye
- Eleanor Shellstrop: This is the Bad Place. I forking knew it! And clam chowder is disgusting. It's just hot ocean milk with dead animal croutons.
- Chidi Anagonye: What-what do we do? Panic? Freak? I usually panic, but I am happy to freak.
- Chidi Anagonye: Michael, what do we do here?
- Michael: I don't know. Apparently, the Bad Place knows one of you actually belongs down there with them, and they want that person to get inside the obelisk, or they're gonna take all of you.
- Jason Mendoza: I can't go! I'm too young to die! And too old to eat off the kids' menu! What a stupid age I am!
- Eleanor Shellstrop: I know it says here that we already tried throwing Tahani under the bus, but maybe we should revisit that. Throw her a little harder. Maybe under a bigger bus. What do you think?
- Chidi Anagonye: I think this is pointless. We're trapped in a warped version of Nietzsche's eternal recurrence.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: [sarcastic] Oh, cool! More philosphy! That'll help us.
- Chidi Anagonye: Well, don't you see the problem? We are experiencing karma, but we can't learn from our mistakes because our memories keep getting erased. It's an epistomological nightmare.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: Ugh! Even your nightmares are boring.
- Chidi Anagonye: You are so mean, Eleanor. You're just like those childhood bullies who said I would never get tenure.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: And you are so irritating! In one of these reboots, I probably strangled you and then went to the Even Worse Place. But you know what? I bet it was worth it.
- Eleanor Shellstrop: We have to stay cool. As my mom always used to say, if a cop handcuffs you to a bike rack, there's always something you can gnaw through.
- Chidi Anagonye: Your mom always said that?
- Chidi Anagonye: So, Aristotle believes your character is voluntary, because... uh, are you ignoring me right now? It's day two of our ethics lessons, and you're already tuning out?
- Eleanor Shellstrop: No, sorry. I just got distracted for a second. The last thing I remember you saying is... nothing. Can you start from the beginning?
- Mindy St. Claire: You've been here 15 times already.
- Chidi Anagonye: What?
- Mindy St. Claire: Did you bring the cocaine I asked for? Please tell me you somehow remembered this time. Mama needs her medicine.