Talon Falls

You know a movie is bad when the cast has no profile pics at all.

It's a rip off of Funhouse Massacre, but it's still enjoyable. The music definitely elevates it significantly. If you haven't checked out Mr. Strange yet, you definitely need to give them a listen. This movie is free on Prime right now, so if your options are watching a repeat or this, give Talon Falls a try.

This was a solid, if not unremarkable, crazy backwoods people horror movie. I liked the set, which I understand is a real haunted house attraction in Kentucky. The setting had a lot of great atmosphere. I also liked the choice of music that played a significant role in the story.

Where I think this movie struggles in the acting by the leads and the story. The two main actresses don't do much more than scream throughout most of the story. Neither really does much to make her character different or memorable. In fact, the screaming was so annoying by the time we arrived at the climax of the story, that I did not feel bad for their disposition. The supportive acting wasn't so much acting as walking and swinging an axe. The bad guys had no development whatsoever.

This leads to the bigger issue - the story. It borrows heavily from the "House of 1000 Corpses" which itself borrowed from "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" and other slasher movies. The scheme is so complex that it makes the puzzles in "Saw" seem practical. If you think about why this haunted house exists or how it can sustain itself or how the killers could have video tapes of victims going back for years without anyone figuring this out, the story falls apart.

I watched the whole movie and it was kind of fun, but it is dumb as a box of hammers.

Oh boy, here we go again, the all so typical mixed group of all American kids on a road trip or a jaunt in the country, the girls with fun on their minds, and the guys with the girls on theirs. And they end up in a house of horrors, except this one is a fake house of horrors that turns out to be a real one.

They are trapped and are doomed to be murdered in gruesome fashion by a group of faceless psychopaths. How many if any will escape? By the end, the house of horrors has become a morgue. How did so many people end up dead there without anyone raising a suspicion? As most of the action takes place in the dark or semi-dark, you won't miss much if you close your eyes and simply listen to the screams. This was 2017, you'd have thought they'd have produced something a bit more watchable by then. One point for the soundtrack.

After reading some bad reviews, I have to say it wasn't that bad. It was quite decent for a low budget production.