The Farewell

A beautiful portrayal of a long farewell and an insight into the difference between western an eastern culture. Powerful performances through and well worth a watch.

The Farewell is a bittersweet Chinese tragicomedy that has the potential to become an Academy Award winner for Best International Feature Film. The movie revolves around an elderly Chinese lady who suffers from an incurable cancer. Her sister however hides this information from her and instead tries to bring all the family together for one last time. A hastily arranged wedding between a grandson and his Japanese girlfriend serves as purpose for the family members abroad to come back to Changchun. However, the burden of this lie is heavy and conflicts, confusion and misunderstandings soon occur.

The most interesting question about this movie is how you would deal with a situation such as the one portrayed in this film if someone close to you were concerned and how you would like to be treated if you were in a similar situation yourself. The family members in this film try to carry the burden together and decide to not tell the aged grandmother that she is dying. There is no right way to deal with such a difficult decision. If you hide the truth, you might prevent the other person to live every day as if it were the last day and to say farewell. If you tell the truth, you will cause an immense emotional burden to the concerned person who will live in fear of dying every single day. The Farewell offers much food for thought and also shows how differently Western and Eastern cultures approach such a scenario.

The acting performances in this film are outstanding. Every character has its own identity from the drunk war veteran who was in love with the elderly lady over the chubby grandchild who is addicted to technology to the deaf housemate who is the only one to mind his own business. Lead actress Nora Lum convinces as concerned granddaughter who disagrees with her family's strategy of hiding the truth from her grandmother and who also has some financial and social problems of her own. Shuzhen Zhao steals the show in her very first movie as headstrong elderly lady with a heart of gold.

The movie portrays the differences between Western and Eastern cultures cleverly and also portrays how the Chinese society is changing. People have become greedy capitalists looking for financial opportunities abroad but also try to embrace their ethnic heritage at the same time. Changchun has developed from a rather small city with less than a million citizens to a gigantic city with close to eight million citizens in only fifty years. The movie shows how gigantic buildings and monuments have replaced small houses and gardens.

The Farewell also has alight-hearted side and manages to cheer its audience up despite numerous heartbreaking moments. The subtle humour works very well and includes drunk war veterans declaring their romantic feelings, hilarious karaoke performances during the wedding and several running jokes in form of the careless deaf housemate and the disconnected overweight grandson.

In the end, The Farewell is an emotional tragicomedy with a profound message: to spend as much time with your loved ones as you can while you can. As someone who is living abroad and far away from his family, I can truly empathize with the movie's meaningful message. Give this movie the chance to inspire your brain and warm your heart.

The Farewell is a tribute to family and an exploration of what sets Chinese culture apart from our own. Writer/Director Lulu Wang drew upon the true story of her own grandmother to inspire this film, and the authenticity of the story shined through. There's something special going on in The Farewell, because I went through an emotional journey with the main character. It's strange how you can start the film feeling that this entire idea and the pretense of their trip to China is so wrong, and then end up seeing the value of it to the point that you don't want the charade ruined. I can't even point to a particular moment or event that was the tipping point which changed my mind, and I don't know if our main character could either. She is clearly transformed by this time with her family, and begins to see that the way of life in China is different, but that doesn't mean it's wrong. The other thing that was magical about The Farewell is that it managed to find humor in the darkness. It's not a big goofy and hilarious comedy, in fact I probably shed more tears than I laughed, but considering how this whole film could feel because of the subject matter, the fact that I was able to find joy in some moments was great.

There were a number of great performances in The Farewell. I absolutely adored Shuzhen Zhao as the grandmother Nai Nai. She has such a delightful joy in her performance that you instantly fall in love with her. I think Awkwafina did a fine job as Billi, the protagonist. I did question some times if she was capable of portraying the layers of emotions that would be going through her character's mind, but she was good enough that she didn't take me out of the film. I also thought that Tzi Ma and Yongbo Jiang were marvelous as the two brothers who are trying to be the emotionless rocks for their family, and sometimes find that they too can't hide their feelings indefinitely. The Farewell also has a beautiful visual aesthetic, and I loved the way some of the shots were framed. There are a few scenes where just the staging and the way they cut to a shot made me laugh out loud. It's one of those movies where I felt there was a lot of thought and intention in the way things looked. Perhaps that comes from Lulu Wang visualizing these events so vividly from her past, and knowing how they needed to look and feel on the big screen. The Farewell is a heart-warming film that made me think about what I would do in the same situation, and made me cry a lot too. Getting me both emotionally and logically invested in the plot is an impressive feat.

Shuzhen Zhao's hospital report says she has terminal cancer. She has perhaps four months to live. They don't tell her. Instead, the family rushes the marriage of Awkafina's cousin so that they can gather with one one last time, without letting her know anything is wrong.

It's been many years since a good friend insisted I look at Ang Lee's THE WEDDING BANQUET and EAT DRINK MAN WOMAN one after the other. When they were done, he said "Well?" and I said "They're so Jewish!" With his comedies of manners about an emigrant culture that sustains itself willy-nilly, rejected by and rejecting the mainstream, both groups are similar in their reliance on family and the dinner table as a means of staying together. Writer-director Lulu Wang's movie is of a piece with these two, with some very entertaining performances, and insight into what family means to people who are forced to be apart.

'The Farewell (2019)' is proudly based on an actual lie, one told (and apparently maintained to this day) by director Wang's own family. It's perhaps no wonder, then, that the film feels so thoroughly realistic, despite its somewhat outlandish central conceit. It's, essentially, a slice-of-life drama concerning a worldly Chinese family's attempts to grieve in secret, focusing specifically on Chinese-American Billi as she tries her best to conflate her 'westernised' ideas with her family's 'eastern' wishes. This theme is delicately explored and its conclusions are wonderfully accepting, but it sits firmly as the backdrop for the sometimes strained, yet always loving, family dynamics on display. Everything just seems so grounded, with relationships that feel so lifelike you could almost swear they were real. This makes the experience subtle yet stirring. Often, it mirrors everyday life all too closely. The piece isn't always riveting, or ever conventionally exciting, but it's always enjoyable and often emotionally resonant. By its end, it's hard not to have been moved. In fact, you may not realise just how much it has touched you until just before its credits roll. 7/10