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Andrew Pifko, Caitlin Carmichael, and Sloane Morgan Siegel in Dwight in Shining Armor (2018)

Caitlin Carmichael: Gretta

Shackled

Dwight in Shining Armor

Caitlin Carmichael credited as playing...

Gretta

Photos

Quotes13

  • Macklyn the Fox: This is a moment long awaited.
  • Dwight: [whispering to Gretta] I don't like how he just said that.
  • Gretta: [whispering to Dwight] Nor I.
  • Dwight: Gretta, just give them the key. It's just money.
  • Gretta: I cannot yield to a common bandit.
  • Dwight: Maybe they have a good reason - you know, rob from the rich and give to the poor.
  • Macklyn the Fox: We just rob from the rich and keep it ourselves.
  • Dwight: Oh.
  • Macklyn the Fox: We rob from the poor, too, actually, though there is less money in that.
  • Gretta: I understand, Sir Dwight. I recall once the duty fell on me to mediate peace between a goblin warlord and a clan of dwarves. The mediation did not go as planned. In hindsight, it's possible I said the wrong thing. In the end they cut each other to ribbons in the great hall and I was lucky to escape the bloody scene with my life. So I know about life's little disappointments.
  • [Gretta has purchased an armful of raffle tickets]
  • Gretta: Nana said I could win a prize.
  • Dwight: I'd say the odds are good.
  • Gretta: So she'll call a number...
  • Dwight: Right. And if you have a ticket with that number, then you get whatever prize is being raffled off.
  • Gretta: Well, what if it's not the prize that I want.
  • Dwight: Well, it's just fun to win something. You know surprises are fun.
  • Gretta: That has not been my experience.
  • Dwight: Come on. Everybody likes surprises.
  • [four men throw sacks over the heads of Gretta and Dwight and drag them away]
  • [first lines]
  • Dwight: All right, one hour before the gates open and the activities committee is buttoned up.
  • Gretta: Simple folk do love their revels.
  • Dwight: It's not all about revels. This event funds the art program for all the schools in Woodside, so without our efforts today, there would be no artists tomorrow.
  • Gretta: Oh, a tragic thought.
  • Sophie: Oh, Gretta, I have a question about your dad...
  • Gretta: Well, I have questions of my own. I was only a babe in my mother's arms when he was devoured by angry fairies.
  • [Gretta refuses Macklyn the Fox's offer to trade the key to her shackles for one item in the Royal Treasury]
  • Dwight: Gretta, a word. Pretty soon one of us will have to use the bathroom or take a bath.
  • Gretta: I once went six months without taking a bath. Who knows how long I can go.
  • Macklyn the Fox: The key, Your Highness.
  • Gretta: Never.
  • Macklyn the Fox: [pointing his dagger at Gretta's throat] The key.
  • Gretta: I will have you hanged for brigand and knave!
  • Dwight: Whoa. Let's not escalate this. Nobody's hanging anybody. You can put that away. The key to what?
  • Gretta: My royal treasury.
  • [Baldric's attempt to free Gretta and Dwight from their shackles only adds leg cuffs to their troubles]
  • Snow Cone Girl: Why are you hooked together?
  • Gretta: Because life is misery and fate is cruel.
  • [Macklyn's search for his identity apparently arrives at a dead end]
  • Gretta: I am sorry you did not find what you seek.
  • Macklyn the Fox: Perhaps some mysteries aren't meant to be solved.
  • Dwight: This is not one of those! What did the witch say?
  • Macklyn the Fox: "The secret to your past is written in the Royal Treasury."
  • Dwight: Anything else?
  • Macklyn the Fox: "That'll be twenty crowns."
  • Dwight: Written in the royal treasury - but not on a scroll... A rug?
  • Dwight: [Dwight shoves away the scrolls covering a colorful tapestry depicting several animals] Recognize that ferret?
  • Macklyn the Fox: 'Tis a fox.
  • Macklyn the Fox: Allow me to introduce myself... .
  • Gretta: Oh, I know who you are.
  • Macklyn the Fox: You do?
  • Gretta: The green garb, feathered cap, rakish bravado and the mysterious tattoo on your left... .
  • Macklyn the Fox: Right.
  • Gretta: Right wrist. You are Macklyn the Fox.
  • Gretta: What's amiss?
  • Dwight: Not a thing. I guess today turned out okay.
  • Gretta: Nobody died... and art may yet flourish.
  • Dwight: Hear, hear.
  • [fireworks explode overhead and Gretta laughs]
  • Dwight, Gretta: Life is misery and fate is cruel.

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