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p0pc0rn_cLassiX

Joined Jun 2013
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p0pc0rn_cLassiX's rating
The Flash

The Flash

6.6
1
  • Jun 18, 2023
  • Multiverse of a privileged public menace

    I pity those that actually paid to see this movie - moreso those that convinced themselves it was anything other than the utmost of industrial dreck.

    There's no shortage of reasons this movie should've been scrapped - especially given how readily they ditched an almost complete Batgirl movie. They even had a perfect exit strategy to recast Ezra Miller, given that the plot revolves around alternate realities and different versions of DC characters. I am baffled as to why they proceeded, especially considering how entirely uncharming Miller is throughout the movie.

    The movie begins with Miller very hamfistedly portraying someone that is clearly meant to be on the spectrum, with all the sensitivity of Sia's musical movie catastrophe. Typical of contemporary representation modalities, autism is depicted as being primarily characterized by obnoxious, self-centered demanding behavior. I am not sure exactly what they hoped to accomplish by establishing the "hero" like this.

    Even more puzzling is the fact that the viewer is soon introduced to a more annoying version of Miller that seems to be channelling a mangled version of Keanu from the original Bill & Ted movie. This incarnation is so irritating that the writers broke the fourth wall and had the original version of the character having a vocal moment of realization of how annoying he, himself, is. At that point, I didn't know what to do but throw up my hands in resignation.

    On the more production related side, it's basically as bad as others have been saying with some consistency. The CGI is PS2 cutscene quality at a lot of points. The editing and plot pace is fumbling. The fanservice is almost completely constrained to the surface with little integration into the plot in any meaningful way. It comes across as a flimsy gimmick to add gravity to a pretty thin main plot - and achieved with some of the most half-baked conceptual visualization I can recall from recent cinematic history.

    On top of everything, the protagonist is hardly any sort of hero, considering the majority of the conflict was his own doing and the larger effects of temporal meddling are clearly left unresolved. I doubt it endears the character more to the audience having constant fisheye close-ups of Miller's gormless reactions. Maybe that's just me!

    I dunno, just thought this thing stunk essentially from top to bottom - a stench only intensified by the baggage brought by the main actor's disturbing reputation and the industry plowing ahead despite all the reasons own the loss or pivot in their approach. Instead they astroturfed early critic screenings and fed them to news outlets to try to cover up the obviously ill-advised festering greed and delusion that made this movie possible.
    Daliland

    Daliland

    5.9
    1
  • Jun 11, 2023
  • Sloppy, fumbling and unflattering portrait

    To be straight, I like some of Dali's work, but I'm not broadly a huge fan, nor do I presume he was without many faults and conceits. That said, it seems like this movie goes out of its way to pretty much exclusively depict negative aspects of Dali's existence. This might have been tolerable if it was done with some humor or intrigue, but it's all executed joylessly with a totally uninvested surface treatment.

    The supporting cast is without much charisma or reason for interest. What characterization does exist is created with broad and boring strokes of writing. Ezra Miller as young Dali was a bit of stunt casting gone wrong -- especially given that his portions add very little to the story.

    On the production side, there is a lot of misplaced licensed music, very questionable editing and some very amateurish seeming cinematography and color correction. The sum of all the parts is little more than a forgettable lost opportunity. I'd recommend watching one of the many interviews with Dali on Youtube instead.
    The Ark

    The Ark

    5.7
    2
  • Mar 16, 2023
  • A master class in hack writing/acting/production

    I didn't watch this show with any distinct initial expectations, so the bar was pretty low as far as being passable to someone starved for half decent sci fi shows. That said, this is some of the most embarrassing TV out there and the only real allure is the baffling consistency of how bad every element is.

    Right off the bat you can see something is awry, as the CG looks a couple decades behind the times. As you're thrown into the plot, you're barraged with basically every sci fi scripting cliche possible. To add to the tedium, they create dramatic entropy by constantly making every plot point some hackneyed circumstantial obstacle with no sense of gravity.

    The acting and characterization is corny and out of touch. The quirked up nerd on the spectrum that can't stop talking is the cherry on top of trite tropes this show trots out like it's doing something.

    The way the show is shot is totally uninspired and often gives the feeling of an overproduced community play. The flatness of the shots gives a great view of how devoid the sets and costumes are of intrigue.

    They ruin any potential for world building by perpetually tripping up on forced and tired drama, which ultimately just makes all the characters seem contemptible.

    Anyway, check this out if you want to see how not to make a show. 💩
    See all reviews

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