ecurr-49427

I'm only two episodes in but I don't think I can handle going any further.

I haven't had one single moment of laughter. I haven't found anything even remotely funny. I don't mind laugh tracks in sitcoms - I grew up with them. But. In this sitcom? It's obnoxious. Since the show lacks humor - the laugh track just feels like pushy punctuation.

Matt Bomer - I'm begging you to do your job and memorize your lines... It's so incredibly distracting to watch him read most of his dialogue. How does this guy keep getting work? I've never seen him believably portray anything. He seems to have a sensitivity to him - I wish he'd dig a little deeper because he could probably pull off some emotional stuff but he just seems to fall short, usually.

The one consistent bright spot is (was) Linda Lavin. She feels very natural and on point. She's why I hung in there for the second episode.

Nathan Lane and Nathan Lee Graham are legends. This must have seemed like a fun project for them to be involved. I hope it is and they're enjoying themselves, at least.

I was so excited about this show. I love sitcoms. I love the cast (minus Bomer). Sad to say - I'm disappointed. Yall can bring on big name guest stars all you want - the writing is too weak to pull me in. Maybe it gets better as the season goes on. I'll never know.

The camera work. Leaves your eyes constantly struggling to readjust, at best - makes you feel nauseated and dizzy, at worst. What were they thinking? One needs a *steady hand* to pull off the artistic handheld approach. This person severely lacked that.

Lighting. What the hell? Too dark to see anything in some really pivotal moments. For the life of me, I can't figure out why they do this.

Plot. It's been done before, nothing groundbreaking.

Writing. Leaves a lot to be desired. Dialogue is weak and superficial. A thousand plot holes and none are intentionally crafted to form a creative interpretation. It's just lazy. Even someone looking for an easy hour of movie watching will still be left with some very obvious questions. Questions like what happened to cause this state of the world? What brought these creatures about? What's the point? It's a pretty lame movie and couldn't even handle the most basic aspects of script writing.

Performance. Nothing noteworthy. The kids (the twin brothers and the neighbor girl) are okay. Not great - but okay. I'm in the camp of Nic Cage is a terrible actor who *sometimes* does an incredible job in some random role that he connected with. Mostly he's just bad. This role is no different. The only upside is - he's not the star - the boys are - and his role is surprisingly small.

Cinematography. Well. Once you get outside of the shacks, out of the pointlessly dark scenes - the outside scenery is gorgeous. Reminds me of Ireland. Even with the beautiful backdrop - you're still seeing it through a vibrating handheld camera shot soooo yeah.

Overall: I'm not hard to impress when it comes to movies. If I like it, I like it. I'm not a movie buff and I rarely regret watching films - even if they're not my cup of tea. That said - this one truly wasted my time. The creatures were okay but honestly - they were more scary when I could only hear them. Once I saw them - meh - whatever - kinda funny. I don't recommend this one. It honestly felt empty. I just finished watching and I'm trying figure out what the point was???

Breakout star: the dog. The dog did a great job. Well trained animal and it was the bright spot of my viewing experience. He's the reason I gave this 2 stars - they're all his - everyone and everything else gets nothing haha.

That's why I didn't give this 1 star. The cinematography is nice to look at. I'm always searching for a decent lesbian film and 9/10 I don't find one. Camp Belvidere is a good example of that let down. I love that Astrid Orvalles is a creative soul. She's a writer, director and actor. The concept for this short film was promising - one character coming of age, another character - a self-loathing lesbian trying to quietly navigate through the 50's. First, I think Molly Way was miscast. No matter how her character was written, she's a total wrecking ball and busts through her scenes - it's too much. Astrid Orvalles is almost completely wooden in this short - except for the love scene - she seems comfortable and comes to life when her character is giving in to her desires. I was pleasantly surprised by that, actually. The second the sex ends, though - she's back to being flat. She would have done better (my opinion) if her co-star was a better fit. The dialogue is unimpressive and paints no pictures for us - it feels sophomoric. Yes, less is more sometimes - but this short needed some life infused into it and the dialogue didn't do that. I rented this on Prime - didn't finish it until the rental was about to expire (because I didn't want to waste my money - that's how little it moved me). I felt like I was watching actors reciting lines - other than the sex scene - I never felt like I was catching a genuine glimpse into someone else's life. Bit of a pet peeve of mine when the main characters can't pull you into their world. I'm guessing the good reviews are because Astrid Orvalles is gorgeous and because the film is nicely shot - it doesn't look like it was filmed with a cell phone in 2009, like a lot of indy/low budget lesbian flicks look. If you want a decent lesbian storyline with decent acting - go watch Kiss Me (in Swedish with English subtitles). I felt like I was watching REAL people - not actors. Bonus: the sex scenes are very realistic. Watch Fire by Deepa Mehta. Emotional storyline - great actors, writing and directing. It's in Hindi with English subtitles. It's more subtle with sexual content - the beauty is in the affection and kisses from 2 women in a culture that fervently rejects that lifestyle. Novitiate by Maggie Betts is amazingly done - I recommend that. If you're looking for more RomCom/dramedy type lesbian movies then go for Chutney Popcorn, Alto, Imagine Me & You. Don't forget Bound! A crime thriller that's sexy, hilarious and tense when it needs to be. Camp Belvidere will remain a lesbian film I'll only ever watch once. Pretty amazing because my bar isn't incredibly high when it comes to lesbian movies.