djohn2581-1

There's more good drama behind the scenes of CALIGULA than there is on screen. Bob Guccione should have stayed in the background as Executive Producer and let the professional filmmakers and editors do their jobs. He couldn't do that and the end result is a confusing hodge-podge of drama, horror, attempted humor, and well-shot but totally unnecessary pornography.

The real story of Caligula is fascinating. He was an inept leader who set new standards of depravity and madness that shocked even the bloodthirsty and jaded Romans. He was probably insane and yet he ruled a mighty empire, if only for a few years. If you want more than a picture of his depravity and mental instability you will have to look elsewhere. May I suggest the very excellent "I, Claudius" as a good place to start?

If you want history or good drama, look elsewhere. If you want good porn, you won't find it here, either. CALIGULA really has no reason for existence other than as a vanity piece for Bob Guccione. As a film, it's not even as good as junk like "Dude, Where's My Car?".

Were it not for the presence of some notable actors, all of whom have disavowed CALIGULA, this film would have scored a 1, and that would have been just a pity point.

Remember when "My Mother the Car" was considered the worst TV show of all time? Well, welcome to the cable age when there are myriad shows that make that old Jerry Van Dyke stinker seem positively Shakespearian by comparison.

MULLETS is inept. MULLETS is only funny when it isn't supposed to be. It's stupid. It sucks. It sucks. It sucks. Even for an "indie" network (as in WB, Fox, or UPN), which have generally low quality programing, this is a low point.

MULLETS is way beyond "bottom-of-the-barrel" programming. You'll find it somewhere in the slime beneath that barrel - there with the creepy crawlies and other loathsome things.

And, no doubt, the cretins behind MULLETS will soon have another series on the air. Yet another reason to turn off the TV and pick up a good book.

Not nearly as good as the first three released films, "Star Wars", "The Empire Strikes Back", and "Return of the Jedi." Episodes I thru III suffer from terrible dialog and wooden acting. While the older movies aren't exactly top-notch scripting, they are at least exciting and move at a quick pace, unlike the newer films which come to a complete halt whenever most of the characters speak. C3PO and Yoda have the best lines and are the most interesting characters here.

The plot and story are fine. What these films needed was a script rewrite - dialog and character interaction need help - and a better director. Lucas should stick to the ideas and being executive producer while letting someone like Irwin Kirshner direct. As for scripting - with so many GOOD screenwriters out of work did Lucas think he could still do it all himself? He seems to have outgrown his once famed ability to write a good, terse script. He does seem enamored with the idea that bigger is better. Story and character development has become buried in a sea of grandiosity and CGI.

All that said, I still enjoyed this movie. It is the best, by a good sized amount, of the recent releases. And, if one can forgive the wooden acting, at least by the leads, and the mediocre direction, this is a good film. It's far from terrible and it is very entertaining.

My problem with all three films is that they could have been so much better. The older films are a lot better and they set a standard which none of the newer films come close to, although "Sith" comes closest.

And to think that "Star Wars" total production cost was less than the marketing budget for "Sith."