GaryPeterson67

If the weeping Indian and Woodsy the Owl haven't already convinced you that pollution is bad... this episode recounting a distant planet's paying the price for polluting their world probably won't either. And didn't we just get this "give a hoot, don't pollute" agitprop pushed on us two weeks ago in "Dr. Pelagion's War"? Is this SUPERFRIENDS or YOGI'S GANG? Ham-fisted Hanna-Barbera goes for an ecological uppercut in this second round... but it's no TKO.

I forgot just how much screentime Marvin, Wendy, and Wonder Dog chew up this season. It's really their show with the Superfriends lending support. Okay, Aquaman builds a wall of whales and Superman and Wonder Woman team up to bring water to parched Dairyland. Talk about hicksploitation! I mean, is this the 1970s or the 1930s? I was waiting for Tom Joad and Grandpa Walton to turn up at the water trough. I suspected the animators hadn't spent much time on the ground east of Hollywood.

Meanwhile, back in Gotham City... Professor Von Knowalott looks a lot like a lost brother of Cain and Abel from DC Comics' House of Secrets and House of Mystery mags. And what a typically obtuse academic droning on about the rotation of planets while the world burns. But seriously, how did this creep already know Wendy but had to be introduced to the Flash? Hmm...

And in the first tugged thread of this episode's unraveling from reality, the Flash rebuilds the collapsed Taj Mahal brick by brick until it's once again Seven Wonders-worthy. Uh, since when did the Flash have super-strength? Or the ability to shoot from his hands "super-ultrasonic vibrations" that can shatter stone?

On that disconcerting note, inconsistencies and goofs include Wendy and Marvin wearing helmets while on the moped during the opening traffic jam, then letting their freak flags fly when riding it later when the tires melt on the hot asphalt. But how come the dump truck's tires didn't melt or the fire hydrant's water turn to steam?

I almost included as a goof Wonder Woman bringing the Dairyland farmers a glacier of seawater. But my Spidey-sense tingled as I typed, so I tabbed over to google it and... who'da thunk it? Glaciers and icebergs are composed of freshwater! (And if anyone objects to my invoking a Marvel character in a review of a DC show... Kolbar started it when he fawned and gushed over the JLA, "I have marveled at their feats of strength, courage and wisdom.")

Looks like we've got another Agatha Christie mystery! Wonder Dog goes for a ride while Wonder Woman takes a powder and Robin flies the coop. Did you notice Wonder Woman and Robin are present when Aquaman talks about the volcanic island Malaba... but they're inexplicably MIA when the Superfriends go there and are AWOL for the rest of the show? Hmm, there's a fanfic plot here....

So why did Supes choose Wonder Dog over Wonder Woman? Adding insult to injury, Flash later steals the Amazing Amazon's spot in the shoulder-to shoulder power pose when they confront the episode's antagonist. Gee, talk about toxic masculinity. Why, I bet it was Andrew Tate not Barry Allen under that mask! (And he sure didn't sound at all like Ted Knight despite the credits.)

This was an okay episode that got better when it went bonkers. I trace the crazy train' wobbling on the tracks to (a) the old firetruck transforming into a spaceship and/or (b) Superman swinging that solar satellite into the sun.

Like Bud Dry, why ask why, right? Like why if Kolbar wanted to remain inconspicuous he would retrofit an antique firetruck into a spaceship? I mean, why not an AMC Gremlin or Ford Pinto? Nobody would look twice at those (already regretting their first looks!). Why ask why the satellite was equipped with defense devices tailor-made for attack by a flying-through-space person? And don't ask why there was already waiting and ready enough copper wire to encircle the globe several times! No wonder the penny went zinc a decade later. And do you think any of that copper wire was recovered? Scrappers were snipping and selling it as fast as Flash could lay it down.

That crazy train is one big rolling railroad, and as Jethro Tull sang it, "Old Charlie stole the handle / And the train, it won't stop going, no way to slow down!" I mean, how else to describe Ted Baxter's informing us that "Using Malaba's molten lava, Superman forges a giant glass bubble to transport his friends swiftly through space..." Uh, did this Kryptonian McGyver remember to pack oxygen? Covid-karen Kolbar's mask ain't gonna save him from suffocating (or from Covid). And of all days for Aquaman to have enjoyed a pickled tuna and sardine omelette with black coffee for breakfast. My kingdom for a Dynamint!

As insane as that scene was, peak bonkers was Superman's *inhaling* the smog on Solar Terrarium! Holy emphysema, Supes, why not just blow it away without sucking in the equivalent of a million Marlboros? Even Bill Clinton knew not to inhale!

Plot twist: Marvin gets the MVP this episode. He proved himself surprisingly competent and daring, from writing the note to making the connection to his father's electronic garage door. He wasn't perfect, losing the photographs (how did Kolbar get them, anyway?) and refusing Wendy's suggestion they summon the Superfriends when they spotted Kolbar in the observatory. "We might lose him," says Marvin. Not if you and Wonder Dog watched him while Wendy stepped into the next room, duh.

I was too worn out to wonder how cleaning up the beachfront and the blowing papers from the street would restore the meteorological balance of this unhinged planet that--typical of this show--got off scot-free from attempted genocide of earth. I mean, Lupis and Kolbar planned to kill every living creature on our planet so they could claim it as their own and colonize it! I've heard of the Great Replacement, but this was that nutty notion on steroids.

Actually, this was the exact plot of the classic sci-fi series THE INVADERS: "The Invaders: alien beings from a dying planet. Their destination: the Earth. Their purpose: to make it *their* world." Hey, Supes, forget Wonder Dog and find freakin' David Vincent!

A quiet episode bridging two arcs, serving as a staging ground for what awaits ahead. We learn the Centennial Festival is coming up and Alina is determined not to let overtime stand in the way of her enjoying it this year. And more ominously, someone is spreading a rumor that there's a secret quest that awards a Dia skill. Alina can only see the rush of adventurers resulting in more overtime, but Glen and Jade see duped adventurers unwittingly awakening more sleeping Dark Lords. Yikes.

Who started the rumor and why? My guess for the who is that sketchy dude with an eyepatch stalking Lululee. As for why, I'm stumped since the rumormonger must know that Dark Lords consume every soul and will make an appetizer of any skill-greedy sap who revives them.

Yeah, the shrieking mandrake was lifted wholesale from HARRY POTTER AND THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS. I loved it and am confident it was intended as loving homage and not a shameless swipe. What a cool link between two fantasy worlds many of us enjoy visiting. Who knows, maybe we'll learn someday that Lululee is a Hogwarts grad?

Let's talk about title sequences. Like what's up with the giant bird? I keep waiting for some development in the series that will explain that... and I'm still waiting. Yeah, it's a cool opening and song but it feels completely divorced from the series we're watching.

And on that same note, five episodes in and I just cannot reconcile myself to the kooky closing titles. They jar me every time they spring up and the jangly music blasts. Like what's with the maracas? Why are Lululee and Laila line dancing then tumbling through space shouting "HEY!" with Alina? Lululee and Laila don't even know each other. I can tell they're going for a retro videogame look, but why? Again, this silly sequence is so utterly discordant with the semi-serious series we're watching. (That said, I admit I can't get that catchy song out of my head for the next 20 minutes. I catch myself randomly shouting "HEY!" It's scary....)

I'm enjoying the series and eager to see what develops over the next seven episodes. I read only the first light novel, so it's all new to me here on out. It looks like putting the kibosh on Dark Lord revivals will be the driving plot going forward. And nothing puts on the kibosh like Alina's warhammer. Here comes the boom!

Random Thoughts and Lingering Questions

Does Alina really hate overtime... or is she playing the martyr while milking the clock? Overtime is usually paid at time and a half, so easy money for a young upwardly mobile professional with a 30-year mortgage and a taste for gourmet cakes (and lots of 'em). There are numerous receptionists at Iffole Counter, but we only see Alina (and sometimes her padawan Laila) working into those wee small hours chugging energy drinks. Everyone else manages to get their work done, why not Alina?

Further albeit circumstantial evidence Alina's a clock-milker: Why didn't she grab Glen by the lapels and demand he keep his promise to double the number of receptionists?

Alina's is a hard-knock life indeed if "other duties as assigned" includes washing the floor... on hands and knees... and in uniform.

Shouldn't the Centennial Festival be a one-time event and not an annual occurrence? I'm old enough to remember America's Bicentennial back in 1976. We didn't celebrate it again in '77 (the country was too busy watching STAR WARS, anyway).

Laila's little Executioner doll took me way back to the Minmay doll of SDF MACROSS. Seeing it, and hearing Laila say that a handsome man's face lurked under the hood, made me finally realize after five episodes a revealing flaw in Alina's costume: the bare midriff! Wouldn't a bared midriff immediately give away the gender of its owner? Alina's or any woman's toned belly would definitely be distinguishable at a glance from any ripped guy's six-pack.

What's in a name? The male protagonist of this series is Jade Scrade. I always think of Jade as a girl's name, but whatever. But this episode introduces a guy named Cybil. Now that's a bridge too far. From the Ancient Greek Sibyls through Cybill Shepherd this has been and is a feminine name. I guess it's a non-issue since Cybil was a not-ready-for-prime-time frontline attacker and self-selected out, so fortunately we shan't again see this showboatin' boy with the green hair.

Cybil's scene with the war-wolf unfolded on the guild's holodeck, evidence that advanced technology exists on this world. So why is Alina scribbling on paper with a calligraphy pen like a medieval monk?

The Silha-Khan Connection. The revelation that Silha the Dark Lord was a Dia relic created by the Ancients that then turned around and destroyed them brought to this aging Trekker's mind the story of Khan Noonian Singh, as recounted in STAR TREK's "Space Seed" episode and the major motion picture STAR TREK II: THE WRATH OF KHAN. He too was the unintended consequence of well-intentioned scientists, an engineered and biohacked human being made stronger and smarter than the average bear. His creation came at a steep price, however, and he proved a plague in his own time and centuries later in Kirk's time. Similarly, Alina's world is now paying the debt with compound interest accrued through the ages no thanks to those revered and august Ancients (whose hagiographic history could sure stand a revision in light of recent events).

Conspiracy Theory

I'm rewatching at this same time the first season of IS IT WRONG TO TRY TO PICK UP GIRLS IN A DUNGEON? And am fast reaching the black-coffee conviction that Jade is the reincarnation of Bell Cranell and Alina is Hestia. I mean, Jade looks uncannily like the 14-year-old Bell grown into a 22-year-old man. And the dark-haired and short-skirted Alina does share Hestia's hair-trigger temper and double-the-fun endowments. Only a goddess, even one unaware in this life of her divinity, could manifest a Dia skill, right? What I struggle to explain is Alina/Hestia's romantic revulsion towards Jade/Bell, unless it's a karmic reversal as Hestia was madly in love with the oblivious Bell who only had eyes for Aiz. And maybe now in this new life it's payback time?

And payback's a... well, what Jade probably calls Alina when he cries into his pillow at night.

I recently enjoyed the first volume of the light novel series "I May Be a Guild Receptionist, But I'll Solo Any Boss to Clock Out on Time"... and now I'm enjoying the anime series. It brings to life Alina Clover and captures well her increasingly complicated life that she tries so desperately to keep simple. Oh, those best laid plans....

While the anime is basically faithful to the original novel, this third episode has a number of deviations worth noting.

Deescalating Glen and Alina's Duel: In the book, Glen is goading Alina (whom he condescendingly calls "li'l miss") about his Sigrus Chronos skill when short-fused Alina just leaps over and bashes her warhammer into his arrogant face, sending him flying into a wall and knocking out teeth. Jade joins the melee and his Sigrus Wall-strengthened shield creaks under Alina's hammer blow. Glen's prim secretary brings a knife to the hammer fight and gets her glasses shattered and bun undone. It's the war to settle the score!

I anticipated all this slam-bang action and excitement in the anime... but nope. They cut right to Glen's time freeze and Alina's Dia skill breaking through his Sigrus skill. Why? This dumbed-down duel was a crushing disappointment to anyone who thrilled to the book's no-holds-barred brawl.

Rufus' Doxxing Debacle. Now this was a major deviation from the book that actually inflicted damage on the anime. In the book, this wannnabe Rufus (who tried and failed in the past to get into Silver Sword), actually sees Alina's face (in the anime, she pulls her hood up). Rufus threatens to expose the Executioner's secret identity as Alina unless he's made frontline attacker. Glen and Jade reluctantly agree because they promised to protect Alina's identity so she could continue working as a receptionist.

But in the anime, Rufus only sees Alina's Dia skills and suspects she's in league with Silha the Dark Lord and threatens to expose her as a "monster." Huh? That's just so lame and is hardly a threat Glen and Jade would take seriously enough to bump Alina off the team. I couldn't understand what motivated this change that defanged Rufus' threat and made Silver Sword look spineless.

Other arbitrary changes made for no discernible reasons: (1) The White Tower of the book is rechristened the "Chalk Tower" in the anime. (2) The first monster they meet in the book is a Cerberus, which was changed to a War Wolf in the anime, robbing us of seeing Alina bash one dog's head that hits the next and the next--one blow, three heads! (Okay, maybe the producers feared kids would be traumatized thinking Alina killed Hagrid's pet Fluffy?) (3) The anime emphasizes Alina's first-class license is fake. It's real in the book, albeit with a fake name. (4) In the flashbacks to Alina's childhood, Shroud is called "Mister Shroud" in the anime but "Uncle Shroud" in the book, which better conveyed Alina's love for him as an adopted family member and added weight to his death.

(BTW, anybody else detect striking similarities between Alina and Shroud's story and Luffy and Shanks'?)

Yes, many events in the light novel are snipped out or condensed due to time constraints. I get it. But why arbitrarily change important plot points?

As much as I am enjoying this anime--and yes, I know it's a cliche--the book is better. I implore you to read the opening volume. Author Mato Kousaka impressively builds her world and her magic system while ably juggling workplace comedy and a budding teen romance. Bringing the book to the anime is making it a fuller experience as I'm able to bridge narrative gaps, like how the adventurers travel to the dungeon through the crystal gates. But it's a double-edged sword as the many mind-boggling and maddening deviations and arbitrary alterations hit with the full force of Alina's warhammer. Here comes the boom...!