Gaymers

This show seems to suffer from not knowing what it's supposed to be. The first season started strong with a fresh and funny plot involving an alien masquerading as the town doctor while a murder mystery unfolds. The puns were clever, the characters were witty and charming. I think it hit its peak too early.

The show was at its strongest when we watched an Harry the alien adapt to a medical environment. I wish the writers had leaned into that more and kept it as part of the core story because that's where it really delivered laughs.

Instead, they quickly phased out the medical angle after the first few episodes and by episode 6 he wasn't even the town doctor anymore. That left writers struggling to justify the medical setting, diluting the story with a bunch of filler plot lines like vilifying adoption and making Asta look like a villain. I guess the adoption plot is intended to add emotional depth, but her biological child hasn't really had a bad life or suffered in any way, causing the story to fall flat. Incidentally it would behoove the writers to know adoption is not a bad thing and plenty of adopted children lead normal and happy lives.

So we finished out season 1 with an uneven mix of highs and lows. There were some incredible moments and some real stinkers.

That brings us to season 2, which feels like everything good about the series is gone. There was hardly anything fresh, funny, or memorable about the first few episodes. That brings us to this episode, which was the last for me.

Its core purpose is, I guess, is making some huge statement about feminism. Every other scene ends with a pun or a jab aimed at illustrating how it's terrible being a woman, everything is better/easier/more awesomer for men, and how the women of Patience, CO are apparently going to right all the wrongs of inequality with one night of drinking and celebrating sisterhood. Cool, cool, let me know how that turns out.

The alien plot line is barely existent, just a slight buzzing in the background as we watch Harry fumble through a couple of cringey and super forced interactions. Again, this show doesn't know what it's supposed to be. The characters aren't moving forward so much as they're just moving along.

If the point of this series was to make some landmark change to society, I'd say yay for that. But the plot is forced, the jokes aren't funny, and the series is barely recognizable from where it began. Even the characters don't really align with who they were in season 1. For example, we're treated to an ongoing gag about BDSM that was mildly humorous at first but has been dragged out and forced into almost every scene just to make the point that BDSM is, um, funny, I guess? It has nothing to do with the original story and feels very weird to see so much sex in a show that wasn't very sexual at all in the beginning.

I wish this show has reached its full potential, but I think the writers tried to do too many things all at once without much planning for the overall story and direction. This was the last episode for me. I have no interest in watching this show continue to go downhill.

So there's this detective. He loves chewing gum. Not bubble gum. Chewing gum. He makes a point to explain this in vivid detail that all gum is gum and you can blow bubbles with any gum. Really cool story and very thought provoking.

If you like watching people chew gum, strap yourself in for a real treat. Scene after scene, there will be long, detailed shots of the detective chewing gum. We even get a lengthy macro shot of his fingers opening a carton of gum and lingering on a square or two before he pops a piece in his mouth.

And the sounds. Oh the glorious sounds. We are treated to loud, Dolby surround quality sound effects as he slurps, sucks, and chews the gum with emphasis on the wet, squelchy sounds. The director makes a point to focus on the gum in all its glory. We're even treated to a parallel montage as two main characters, the detective and the killer, chew gum simultaneously. The camera pans up close to each character's mouth so we can see the gum smacking around in there. God I almost died when I experienced that in all its visceral rapture.

Open-mouth chewing is encouraged and frequently showcased. The detective chews loudly and with gumption, his gaping mouth wide open like a cow chewing grass. There's really no such thing as too much screen time for the gum. The director makes sure to remind us in every episode just how much the detective loves his gum.

So that's it, folks. 8 episodes of loud, wet, HD quality gum chewing. It's truly a masterpiece of modern storytelling. I've never seen a series devote so much screen time to gum chewing. And it's completely intentional. I'm glad that the gum industry is funding such compelling cinema these days.

Oh and there's some subplot about a killer who kills other killers but it's really just filler in between all the glorious gum chewing.

The original Star Wars films ("4-6" as we're now supposed to call them) were FUN. It's that simple. They had action, surprise, and a bit of humor. They were a treat for viewers young and old.

"The Last Jedi" is an overwhelming smorgasbord of dramatic side stories, multiple plots and conflicts, all stuffed into one film. Could the writers not agree on a single storyline to follow?

I get it. The film is supposed to be more dramatic, more emotional. Snore... I'm not a fan of emotional dramas. More power to you if you enjoy them. But again, this franchise is supposed to be FUN. Does anyone remember what fun feels like these days?

You have the heroes, the villains, and the battle between them. It's a tried and true action-packed formula that has served countless classic films.

Take, for example, this movie's long and winding exploration of Kylo Ren's inner feelings. I don't care. I'm not interested in the moody emo villain and his complex emotions. Again, heroes and villains. Action. Fun. Let's go.

I miss the magic of the original films. Unfortunately those days are long gone in a galaxy far, far away.