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cosmophagist's profile image

cosmophagist

Joined Aug 2006
Prog / tech death metal fan.
Craft beer enthusiast.
Filthy liberal.
Cat dad.

Badges4

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Ratings3K

cosmophagist's rating
Black Christmas
7.14
Black Christmas
Silent Night, Deadly Night
5.85
Silent Night, Deadly Night
Fargo
8.17
Fargo
The Age of Disclosure
6.96
The Age of Disclosure
Wicked: For Good
7.06
Wicked: For Good
Carrie
7.47
Carrie
Candyman
5.96
Candyman
The Jurassic Games: Extinction
3.76
The Jurassic Games: Extinction
Deathstalker
4.65
Deathstalker
Arcadian
5.56
Arcadian
Together
6.77
Together
Nightfall
7.26
Nightfall
The Hatchling
7.86
The Hatchling
The Living Dead Girl
5.86
The Living Dead Girl
The Toxic Avenger
5.96
The Toxic Avenger
The Worst Witch
6.84
The Worst Witch
Candyman
6.77
Candyman
Weapons
7.57
Weapons
Companion
6.97
Companion
Primitive War
5.36
Primitive War
6.67
Ali Siddiq: My Two Sons
Creature Commandos
7.88
Creature Commandos
Peacemaker
8.38
Peacemaker
Greg Davies: Firing Cheeseballs at a Dog
7.77
Greg Davies: Firing Cheeseballs at a Dog
Rocko's Modern Life: Static Cling
6.97
Rocko's Modern Life: Static Cling

Reviews12

cosmophagist's rating
Alien Contactee

Alien Contactee

4.0
1
  • Mar 25, 2021
  • Terrible

    Terrifier

    Terrifier

    5.5
    5
  • Aug 14, 2020
  • What it lacks in substance it makes up for in gore

    Even with its lean runtime, this movie still somehow drags a bit. The acting is alright; nothing amazing, but it works. The plot is simple and, to be honest, not a lot really transpires beyond creepy clown being creepy. I won't spoil anything, but don't go into this looking for anything more than a creepy clown movie. Where this movie ABSOLUTELY shines is the gore and effects. Yes, the clown is amazing, but the gore effects are phenomenal (and graphic). So while I give this movie a 4ish overall on plot (etc), it deserves an extra star for the clown, twisted stuff, and effects.
    Legend of the Red Reaper

    Legend of the Red Reaper

    2.2
    1
  • Jan 5, 2018
  • Heed the warnings of others

    I wanted to like this film. I saw the reviews, but went into it anyway with an open mind.

    Now, I can usually find SOMETHING about a film to like. In this case, there is an okay concept buried in there somewhere deep. Bad acting and bad effects can be forgiven if there's some meat; some substance. But this film is just so painfully, dreadfully, boring and slow. Just when it feels like it's starting to wrap up, you realize there's still roughly 40 minutes left. By the time things "pick up" (in the loosest sense), most people will have already checked out.

    This movie is a paradox. It's like they tried so hard, yet not at all.

    When the credits roll, you find Uwe Boll's name listed immediately as one of the executive producers, and it somehow all finally comes together and starts to make sense in some sort of cosmic way.

    It's as if someone took what could have honestly been a decent 20 minute fantasy short film and extrapolated it to a 100 minute runtime - while doing absolutely nothing with that extra time AT ALL.

    I would only recommend this film to the friends and family of the people that made it. And I doubt they will be friends or family after viewing it.
    See all reviews

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