jessekillshookers
Joined Apr 2008
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Reviews1
jessekillshookers's rating
I recently watched this movie (for free) and I was sadly, sadly disappointed.
The only situation in which I would recommend watching this movie is if you are planning on watching another movie in the near future, and want to have a new appreciation for it. After watching this movie, you'll be in awe over the cinematic quality of "Living Dead : Rave to the Grave" and think the dialog in "Meet The Spartans" could only have been written by Sir William Shakespeare himself.
Everything about this movie was horribly executed, from the shaky camera to the poor audio quality.
The characters are poorly developed; when the film goes out of the way to create a connection between two characters or a back story, you're not shocked or intrigued, but you're left thinking "aw, at least they tried."
The fact of the matter is that I've watched this movie 3 times now, and I still have no idea what's going on.
Also, the characters are all cliché, played-out stereotypes. The angry black man from Brooklyn, the single mother, the sexist anti-American Frenchman, the greasy Italian mob boss, the black-belt Chinese fighter, and the repressed-childhood-conflicted-overly-emotional-middle-aged white man.
In order to make this movie more interesting, I suggest playing a few How-Hilariously-Bad-Can-It-Get Games :
1) Count how many times DMX gets angry for no reason. 2) Count how many times they use the same track of footsteps in the background(You'd be surprised) 3) Pick out the scenes in which the actors clearly forget their lines and attempt to ad-lib it.
In conclusion, if you were planning on watching this movie, I would suggest doing something more pleasurable, such as shoving a fork in your ear. Or maybe a spoon, depending on your masochistic preferences.
The only situation in which I would recommend watching this movie is if you are planning on watching another movie in the near future, and want to have a new appreciation for it. After watching this movie, you'll be in awe over the cinematic quality of "Living Dead : Rave to the Grave" and think the dialog in "Meet The Spartans" could only have been written by Sir William Shakespeare himself.
Everything about this movie was horribly executed, from the shaky camera to the poor audio quality.
The characters are poorly developed; when the film goes out of the way to create a connection between two characters or a back story, you're not shocked or intrigued, but you're left thinking "aw, at least they tried."
The fact of the matter is that I've watched this movie 3 times now, and I still have no idea what's going on.
Also, the characters are all cliché, played-out stereotypes. The angry black man from Brooklyn, the single mother, the sexist anti-American Frenchman, the greasy Italian mob boss, the black-belt Chinese fighter, and the repressed-childhood-conflicted-overly-emotional-middle-aged white man.
In order to make this movie more interesting, I suggest playing a few How-Hilariously-Bad-Can-It-Get Games :
1) Count how many times DMX gets angry for no reason. 2) Count how many times they use the same track of footsteps in the background(You'd be surprised) 3) Pick out the scenes in which the actors clearly forget their lines and attempt to ad-lib it.
In conclusion, if you were planning on watching this movie, I would suggest doing something more pleasurable, such as shoving a fork in your ear. Or maybe a spoon, depending on your masochistic preferences.