stirdgit

First off, I must say, I have seen some bad movies in my day. I endured "The Butterfly Effect", "Rocky 5", "The Exorcist 3"... and many more. But "Star Quest: The Odyssey" takes the prize. Please... please do yourself a favor and rent this movie. If you are into bad movies... and I mean movies so bad they make you cry laughing then this is the movie for you. I can't begin to tell you how bad this movie is. You must experience it for yourself. I could try to explain the weak plot, or the bad acting, or the slow motion, cheese-filled flash back scenes, but it would do no good. Again, this is one you must experience for yourself. I could try to convey to you just how poorly rendered the special effects are, but you would never in a million years believe that such slop could somehow manage to obtain distribution. This is a true masterpiece of "bad", the holy grail of garbage, the Stanley Cup of feces. Anyone with a camcorder and a severe case of stupid could've constructed this flaming pile of dung. Actually, anyone with just a little too much time on his or her hands could've at least made something worth sitting through. I tried. I tried valiantly to make it through this thing but I failed. After the comedy wore off, I found myself seething with rage; angry that a troop with such an obvious lack of talent and ability had made it even this far in the movie industry. I watched exactly 44:23 of this abomination and turned it off. The tears of laughter had dried up 20 minutes ago; the next 24:23 was simply boring and bad. I realized that there are some tests of endurance that simply are too much for me. I failed in my quest. But alas! There were those glorious first 23 minutes! Truly I have never laughed so hard at a movie in all my life. No... this was not the intent of the director, nor was it the desired effect of those who saw fit to fund this squalid pile of filth. But for 23 minutes of my life, I pounded the floor in shear blissful conviviality... purely overwhelming jocularity as I watched what is, hands down, the worst movie in the history of forever. And so in closing, I implore you, if you want to laugh at the misfortunes of others, without feeling bad about yourself, please rent this movie.