rossini-1868

Everything, and I do mean EVERYTHING, that made the first movie the biggest shock and surprise since Jaws...everything is GONE. Aside from a strong neo-Jurassic flashback at the opening, this movie spends the first hour wasting everybody's time with a bunch of noise and a big mess of chaos that meant absolutely nothing...

But after about an hour (it took them long enough), they finally make it to a bikini beach. Not sure exactly what they were there for, but the Meg was somewhere off shore, and between the bikinis and the giant shark this movie, briefly, hit a stride similar to the first one. They managed to correct the BIG mistake they made, when they chose to film this sequel without the Bingbing herself. The movie barely avoids becoming a big, unwatchable mess.

Even so, not using Li Bingbing was inexplicably DUMB. There was a motherlode of a story around her, her daughter and the male lead that would have made this movie seriously worth watching. As it stands, this thing barely made it.

What this low budget movie lacks in originality, it more than makes up for in sheer effort, and a refusal to abandon the classic ghost story. Its the kind of script that if Sam Raimi or James Wan had gotten their hands on, there would be a totally different discussion all around about this movie.

The focused, incredibly simple, mother-daughter premise is worthy of Japanese horror, translated through Lifetime's unique way of doing things. Jeri Ryan's luck as an iconic television actress is all over this project, with music, cinematography and other production values that make this a cut above most tv movies. Ryan as the mother to the two very smart, very pretty daughters seriously adds to the inspired simplicity of this story, which wisely chooses to obey every cliché, until their tragic little narrative point is made. Better than a lot of big budget horror nonsense from Hollywood these days.

So what if the Avatar 2 story was a familiar rehash. That wasn't the problem. Terminator 2: Judgment Day was literally, a big budget remake of the first one. And nobody complained. Its because James Cameron went back into the elements that made the first one a classic and improved them. Same story, only bigger and better.

But this time, in this "Avatar: Way of Water" project, he veered off into self indulgent boredom. The brilliantly simple and inspired elements of the first story are all but scattered to the wind and the sea here. He touched on a few interesting, familiar paths but abandoned them over and over, until we were left with a vacuous, disappointing ending that did NOTHING but lay there like one of those beached weird-eyed whales in the Pandoran Sea.

I hope Avatar 3 gets back to business, and lets a FEMALE CENTERED story grow and develop into something that is worth sitting through for three hours. We're no longer impressed with the visuals of Pandora alone. The kickass, female centered STORY that made the first one so good to the very last frame...rehash it right.