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Unconvincing banale acting, lousy story, coy, rotten script, poor direction, bland music, low budget, cheap scenery, fake costumes. Completely unengaging, like the worst of bad daytime televison. Camera work, lighting and makeup earns the 2nd star. Just. Barely. Shakycam nearly lost it. This is a C-movie.

Deadly Illusions sets off to a promising start before sliding gradually into farce. It feels as if those involved just went along with the flow, perhaps too naive or too scared of the director to speak up about the bizarre script and poor editing. Inconsistent pacing, curious but incomplete interludes and the laughable plot, combined with unconvincing acting and a pathetically weak ending, result in an altogether unsatisfactory performance. If this was produced as a showcase or proposal for a film to be made by a major studio, it would not have sold without significant improvements. As it is, it falls almost completely flat. The one bright spot (sufficient for a second star) is Greer Grammer's vindictive persona that finally emerges after far too much of her vacant sicophantic drivel in the first three-quarters. That at least was convincing and heart-felt, whereas the rest were merely coasting along.

Such an inconsistent series of episodes - a few quite good, most OK, some sheer farce, barely up to am-dram-panto standard ... and yet strangly addictive, wondering if the next episode will be worth watching or another big let-down. The entire premise is weird: a dozen spooks backed by a bevvy of silent extras, all studiously avoiding the limelight, and supported by an invisible army of tech wizzards capable of, of, well, whatever fantastic nonsense is required for the sake of the plot. Invisible, undetectable two-way comms - no problem. Instant teleportation anywhere in the city, why not? Trackers that go ping as the red dot crosses the map like an 80s video game, sure. A backpack bomb complete with LED countdown, naturally! I almost expected Bruce Willis to make a guest appearance, just behind Mr Bean.