What’s the worst outcome at the end for you Made mistakes Blamed yourself As if you knew I caught you living Waiting in the wings Silent in your observance Contempt at a performance That was winding Left you in your seat Clenching fists A solo protest A signaled distress Take a page A phrase to use for my values Change with winds That don’t even make the news I caught you trembling No cards up your sleeves Inactive participant Remarks of regrets Justifying a room just for me Make myself at home Make my bed Hung up on these threads Was there a time or a place Where we could just breathe easily Or is this fight inside how it is always supposed to be Don’t know what’s waiting The doors you can see Stand there Or take on the test Done with feeling restless Rationalizing The crowds are parting Are you moving or still staying A habit of just wasting

Shouting into your ears Come pick up the call It’s the thought not the act that gets the applause You showed your teeth Leaving no hint of mystery Now I’m hiding all the cutlery from you 81 to 42 Knew when to make the call Knew it was ingenuine Knew how to dodge it all Fill in the blank arguments out Like a cannonball Make it all make nonsense Climb up four stories tall Roll the sleeves Leave before getting into deep Hang up my familiar routine Guaranteed I wore my best suit Outside the gutters Sweat off the cigarettes Result to calling it the best three hours slept Stain in your coffee Lie in your office Tie up these long term threats Smoke it all before the day I quit The white wall hours start to fade to grey And the best actor forgot what lines to say It’s overdue I’ll rest my burdens on you Last goodbyes Counting down hours They’ll come soon Rewrite the story Retrace the problems Whatever suits you best Maybe one day you’ll give all the lies a rest

Manufacture the reasons Never empty and never running out Never took off a season Never weathered a single drought What’s the reason for sleep Are you tired now Not the judgment I need from you What’s the news of the week Still alive and how It’s the best that they’ve seen Storm the gates of the evening Burn through all the phrases of burning out Pillage through all the alleys Pull yourself from welcoming towns I waited, I bargained What’s left empty from distances spreading out Passing out til the ending Not giving a single doubt First stop, too late Take the next train Always one way just to repeat this solo Still hungry for the rest of the week Take off the days All plans erased Stay in the way just to be seen Trying to make a way in between Went out the way The names they say All felt the same sounding to me The insanity of expecting a thing One more, too late Can’t keep it straight Life in delay, keep it discreet Never thought past a day or a week Left at the doors Promised the pour They’ll be no more mistakes Is this all the learning one could take Is this the course It’s been a bore It’s been the best that I could make A miracle to see a new day No more counting the reasons

I’ll be right back before I’m gone Staring with two at the same moon Marking with every single June The turning leaves before a call Mornings were evenings to you But then it all became consumed The echoes in alleys danced through all the bars Left me older than you are There’s no more do-overs, there’s no more to see A flight that’s not returning Through all the pictures that could tell Faster than I could ever do But losing never was a rule This was supposed to find you well But now it’s all gone dark Couldn’t even begin where to start From radio signals Lived in melodies A steady beat to a memory Traced the number, record the cover Try to remember it all The towers were your stories tall Looked back too late before it fell Always the first in line to help Through the difficulties, worked with the strategies Now there’s no way to use my voice As if you had another choice Out of time, out of sync Is anyone still listening Sat outside for hours Let go all the doubt Transmitting the signals now We went through the troubles Lived in melodies A steady beat to a memory

In the busy hour’s rest Hurried like the city ended In the early eyes that met Colored a new morning and then . . . Red light faces Same old places Pass the parties Always starting Is this the one that she wanted to know Outside byes and hellos Outside a life followed too The moment turned as soon As the afternoon towered over like the trees Time passed in between 1 to 3 Take this day as it is, not what You wanted How we parted Expectations filled in this pen Written honest Loud as echoes in rooms Footsteps in hallways with you Upstairs to get to the . . . Same end of the day but right after you Sat like partners before we had all the clues Stood in the same frame out of each other’s view Against the wall in a room saved just for us A lie to be told, no more secrets left unknown Only one way to see A rest of an evening Night escaping Message waiting now with nothing to do What else could I redo It was all moving on, with or without you Listen to your favorite song Felt like such a fool Was I right or just wrong Too late or too soon Staying here ‘fore it’s gone I waited for this moment Now words failing somehow like before When I could just scream The only voices at me Counting to 1 to 3

Did you lose your way home Checked all the locks to see who’s alone The last message left to read Took comfort in silence Mood breaking Answering machines When was the last time you breathed Drowned into private oceans alone Away from scenic coasts Sweated through the scenes Always had a dream Stopped and followed your parking lot rules Tire marks on your only road Bottles in backseats have already gone cold Never once looked back A single doubt never had You’d simply refuse Split like the continents are So close, but so far Now farther from you Hum to this endlessly Call and response in key Fast forward to the one about youth Thirty odd years Now you’re gone Counting down The timing was wrong Smashing bottles Breaking along Rang out like a song Grew from party thieves To just existing Better or worsening No more answers we both know What was your worst dream? Do you feel anything The books were never true Do you know where you are? Listened to Jets under stars Autumn walks with you Echoed hollow Steps through this town Stomping on the ground Cast from shores Your leave Streetlights are dimming Monuments are missing Marked the stories on your bones

Along walls Sudden cold Days in bed Doctors told Another one Another test in it for you Wake up again For your medication Lights out Hallucination Swallowing it all Ignore all what you saw I signed the lines Listened to your version of truth Smiled through all the fiction Saw my discarded questions Sacrificed the hearts Deeper incisions From the day Smelled a fire far away From inside came a call Not my house Not mine not at all Felt like only I could see The diseases that trailed around me In the throat I left words there Run for cover Out of here Discharged without rehabilitation No treatments for the patient What’s the cause Took a winter like a loss Count the days Breathe like the sea From the shore and receding Is this back to a start Leave my bed when the hour’s dark With a back to the city Leaning to a night softly Exhale the inhalation Exit the conversation This is a resignation

I’m fine. I’ll stay. Off of someone's confidence Off what they say I’ll soon forget all the context naturally Like floods and fires Devastating my escapes It always happens somehow, someway Caution signs Stay behind lines Keep my eyes set on the dial Stay inside From the streets Livers are dying Here come the problems They’re coming What’s the use in ever running Out of time The wait for apologies is has run out Like these rhymes Fill the space with something useless Something loud Sentiment won't do justice for these crowds Regrets aren’t the only reason for now The words from the trees Was all that I’ve seen You’re sick and tired of listening to me Panicking Sat at the edge Forget what I said Found home in the silence Found pages in books no one had the patience for/four Years counting me Laid to waste Waiting up for hours Watch the days drop deep into the sea They had nowhere else to leave The mornings dragged by cups Taken by the throat And the love that was handed over like some keys The bells were always there ringing Seconds passed alone Hanging on the line Rest the eyes Closing off Nothing that’s worth seeing Just go back watch the same dream Lie in the fallow The end of the show Bouquets of flowers While everyone’s standing Is it the last one The first or second Another lesson on how to keep waiting For years counting slow Did the least to wait for hours Slept through days Goodbye remembering The one day I said I would leave The boring of the dusk Calling the moon down And to cover my love For the midnight streets Arms crossed around lonely cities The places you roam The long way home Are all of nothing happening Always knew you’d say the same thing The spaces we found low Escaping through the days I don’t know how I’ve been surviving When living all this on repeat

Escaped through the pews Aimed for a distant sea Clean with the salt then bury me Sank like the months that drifted aimlessly Broke from the rock that was crumbling me I took the tide, drowned in the summer Pulled at the chords, at the rest Hid under red, flew under cover Counted goodbyes in my chest Sighed with the breeze for it to carry me Stationed for years in the undersea Swimming through blood Thinner than it would seem Projecting all the film all off screen Through the twilight Caught some oxygen Washed from the bay Airing a breath Made my escape just like a lover Through the night stole back exits Light through the eyes Blinding all the lies Past sleeping through leagues every night Resting my knees Stretched lungs in the streets Smoked all the air into me Between the sun and sea

After it’s done I’m sending some words Some things I never said before No time enough celebrating Pacing back and forth Energy at the door Radiating Thought things were gathering before Overheating Growing out of season once more Knock at the door Answering After the tone Empty air hits the floor Stay in touch Extending My reach is pulling muscles than before Snapshots to places and faces seen no more Moments where fields of countless hours once grew Feeling like present and future are closed stores The last train departed just before What could I say To words you gave Left waiting in the cold Lost in empty streets Left on the floor Rewrote, reword Tied all the flowers at the ending Always too late A pause, delay The ground planted me Left me standing there Count the hours left to be heard Passing through stations in a strange air Is it too much to say Moving further, far away Time and space become more what we knew What’s the point of wanting more There’s no answer at the door Don’t know if there’s a next year Another day got in the way Where reasons came through for not being there Before the time Let’s meet, rewind Leave the past in the earth somewhere far from here I’ll set this right No rest from fights If I’m taking punches then I’m still clear Laid in a bed Never forget all of the branches that kept us near