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The Thrilling Adventure Hour: Sparks Nevada, Marshal on Mars

Sparks Nevada's "I'm from Earth" Day Special (Season 3, Episode 7)
Podcast Episode | Comedy
There are in total three stories. There is a main story that wraps around the other two, self-contained stories. The main, wraparound story opens with Sparks Nevada entering the saloon. Felton tells Sparks that the Barkeep put him in ...See moreThere are in total three stories. There is a main story that wraps around the other two, self-contained stories. The main, wraparound story opens with Sparks Nevada entering the saloon. Felton tells Sparks that the Barkeep put him in charge of cleaning and preparing the saloon, but only three out of the four custodial bots listened. Sparks says it's okay, since this is a day for celebrating, as its Earth day, and that's where Sparks is from. The Space Saloon, back in working order, has begun flirting with Croach again. Sparks orders space rotguts all around, but both the Red Plains Rider and Croach turn him down. The saloon doors open and three aliens enter, excited to see Sparks, Croach, Red, Felton and the Barkeep. Red reckons these aliens know about some of them because of Rebecca Rose Rushmore's book, but they know too much. The aliens say they are a race called the Bhatu and they have watched all of Sparks' exploits, since they have been transmitted to their planet via Mars' satellites. They are the biggest fans of the "show" Sparks Nevada and his Pals on Mars, a Space Western. The Bhatu traveled here to meet their favorite characters, and they ask questions and squee over everything Sparks and the others do. The Bhatu get excited when Sparks and the other start a small argument, saying that their bickering is how they express their affection for one another. The Bhatu Okvar recounts an "obscure episode" to prove the point. Side Story One The story opens not very long after Sparks and Croach teamed up, when they were still vying for Red's affections. Red had chosen Sparks, and after a day of further bickering between Croach and Sparks, Croach had left and headed for the Saloon. Sparks also enters the saloon, then complains to the Barkeep that he is mad at Croach. The only people around are The Widow Johnson, who is crying because her husband had recently passed away, and Amos, who is belligerent. Barkeep says he don't not want no trouble in his place, meaning he DOES want trouble in his place. The Saloon has been redecorated in the manner of 1920's Gangster-Era Las Vegas, and everyone is dressed likewise, which the Barkeep points out to Sparks. The Barkeep, Amos and the Widow Johnson also mention being agonized repeatedly. An alien enters, and agonizes everyone in the room but Sparks until they promise to act in character. The Barkeep shoots at Sparks, badly and against his will, until Sparks knocks him out. Amos tells Sparks that the alien attached the agonizers to their nervous systems, then the alien vanishes Sparks' robot fists, puts him in a pinstripe suit and affixes him with an agonizer, which is re-routed to Felton, who enters. The alien has bright pink skin, halos circling around him, and reality-altering powers. He is an omnipotent being from a race that long ago stopped being corporeal. His name is K, shorthand for a name so complicated a human would spend the rest of their lives just saying it. He is a bored all-powerful reality bending entity who studies Earth history and recreates it on various planets and dimensions as the mood strikes. K is whimsical. He is also unkillable. Growing tired of Gangster-Era Las Vegas, K directs everyone to the room behind the bar. There is an exact replica of the Coliseum, for which K has confused Cesar's Palace in Las Vegas with Rome. He declares that Sparks, The Barkeep, The Widow Johnson, Felton and Amos are the combatants, gladiator style. Croach, who was already captured, also enters the ring. The combatants kill each other until only Sparks and Croach are left. Sparks and Croach parry to buy time, but spend most of it bickering over who would win if they actually fought, emotions, and The Red Plains Rider. K empowers Croach and Sparks' punches to be deadly, and Croach asks to be death-punched to be free of his onus, as he thinks Sparks is irreplaceable while he isn't. Sparks refuses to death-punch Croach, because he feels bad that Red chose him. Croach says he has nothing to live for, and no hobbies, and would be glad to perish in deliverance of G'loot Praktaw. He attempts to force and prod Sparks to punch him. K gets frustrated, and threatens to agonize everyone in the coliseum if they don't cheer while he decides who lives and who dies for fun and whimsy. Sparks realizes that K is doing all of this for attention and to be liked, so he encourages K to use empathy. Croach suggests K brings everyone back to life, as well, which would help him to be liked, so he does. Sparks says he could also go away to make people like him, and K leaves. Sparks and Croach leave together to turn the town back to how it was. Main Story Part Two The Bhatu continue to talk about the episodes in Sparks Nevada, especially The Piano has Been Thinking. Feeth says that he can't believe that people would burst into song as they did, and then proceeds to start singing "If You Love Something Never Set it Free". They then put Sparks, Red, the Barkeep, Croach and Felton each in a stasis field, because they love them so much that they might kill them. They discuss what to do with their new captives, like make them kiss, or ship them together. They want to hold them in stasis until Cactoid Jim comes to their rescue. They keep making the stasis fields smaller and tighter so Jim will be sure to come rescue them, that nick-of-timing Cactoid Jim. Sparks offers to tell the Bhatu about an episode they haven't seen yet to delay the Bhatu from killing them. Side Story Two This episode was not long ago, and also happens in the saloon. Sparks enters the Saloon, is greeted by The Saloon Doors, and orders a space rotgut. The Barkeep waxes about having so much trouble in his place, and Felton enters yelling for halp as there's been a recent prison break and a prisoner is coming to the saloon to kill Sparks. The escapee is a woman. The saloon doors open again, and the Doors sound unhappy that Croach has entered. Croach tells Sparks that he has a feeling Sparks is in great danger. The doors open again and Red enters. Shortly thereafter, the Barkeep turns into Sparks Nevada. Then Red, Felton, and Croach all follow suit, turning into exact replicas of Sparks Nevada in looks and voice. All of the Sparks begin to believe they are the real Sparks. The Saloon Doors says that the Nevadafication does not affect her, though she knew it was happening as she monitors the air. She decides to set her vocalizer to Nevada, as well. Bad Betty Dupree enters and lets all of the Sparks know how bad she is. She threatens to kill Sparks Nevada, but she only wants to kill the real Sparks Nevada, not a clone. Because she has OCD, she must kill only actually Sparks so she can kill everyone on the list the same number of times. Betty says she is not to blame for the Nevadafication. Croach-Sparks asks why she has a personal vendetta against him, or all of them Betty says she was the greatest outlaw the galaxy had ever seen until she got caught, though it took a fleet of USSA star crafts. Her accomplice, Doctor Diagonal, an alien that has tentacles, a visible brain and weird shoes, had gotten caught earlier by Sparks Nevada. He was a mad scientist who made the deathiest death rays, and testified against Betty in her trial. Sparks also testified at the trial very briefly. Betty was supposed to hang, but she broke out before the execution and vowed to kill everyone involved in locking her up. She killed Doctor Diagonal, the judge, the bailiff, the stenographer the people who watched the trial, and Sparks is the last one on her kill list, but she only wants to kill the real Nevada. None of the Nevadas know who is who, including if they themselves are the real Nevada. The doors open, Doctor Otto Letharias Diagonal enters, and Betty is shocked that he is still alive, as she disintegrated him. Diagonal says his race, (whose name is basically impossible to transcribe, it sounds like a clucking along with high pitched gutteral noises), must be killed twice before they actually die. If Betty kills Diagonal again, because of her OCD she'll have to find everyone on the list again and bring them back to life only to kill them in the correct order a second time. Diagonal says he did the Nevafication in order to keep Betty from reaching her goal. He also says he's gonna kill all the Nevadas so Betty will never be able to kill the real Nevada, which also means he gets revenge on Sparks for capturing him and making him testify against his best friend. Betty, touched that she's Diagonal's best friend, makes amends with him. They decide to team back up to kill all the Nevadas, but the real Sparks draws his gun and shoots the guns out of Diagonal and Betty's hands. All the other Nevadas team up to finish the work of arresting and jailing the criminals. Felton-Sparks asks how long the half-life of the radiation is going to last, and Diagonal answers - about 700 million years. Main Story Part 3 Back in the present, Sparks says that getting out of the Nevadafication required parallel dimensions and perpendicular dimensions and a whole lot of space paste. Meanwhile, their stasis fields keep getting tighter, and Croach says this is the single most painful sensation he has ever experienced. The Bhatu are still sure that Jim will arrive to save his friends. The Saloon Doors open again, and more Bhatu arrive. They know the original three Bhatu and say that they were watching Sparks Nevada and his Pals on Mars when they saw the "new" characters. They say fandom doesn't adhere to regular logic, but a line was crossed between fantasy and reality, and now the three original Bhatu are the three new Bhatu's favorite characters. The new Bhatu trap the old Bhatu in stasis fields so they never change and will make them kiss. Putting the original Bhatu in stasis interrupts Sparks and the others stasis fields. Sparks uses the robot fists on the Bhatu, and the three new Bhatu are about to leave with the three original Bhatu when Sparks suggests that first they do the part they left out, together - singing the Sparks Nevada theme song. Written by Thrilling Adventure Hour Wiki See less
Read more: Plot summary
Director
Aaron Ginsburg
Composer
Eban Schletter
See all filmmakers & crew (6)
Status
Edit Released
Updated May 20, 2013
Release date
May 20, 2013 (United States)

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