*Going through my library to review games I primarily played outside of Steam*

A playable pop album via autorunner that's beautiful, original, and brief. Simogo doesn't miss.

i don't really know what else to say other than that this is actually just a bad video game. it feels like someone wanted to make a concept album, created the soundtrack, remembered like two months before the intended release date that they were actually mean to be making a game instead, panicked, and then just threw whatever they thought sounded cool into unity and hoped for the best with sayonara wild hearts as the end result of it all.

the controls are ridiculously floaty; the visuals are extremely overwhelming and make it so that for large portions of the game it hurts just to look at the screen for longer than like three seconds at a time; a new gameplay mechanic is thrown at you approximately every two minutes and only lasts long enough for you to start getting used to it before it switches to the next, practically none of which make sense or are justified in their inclusion (why am i suddenly floating through a 3d space instead of on my bike? why am i fighting a mechanical wolf monster with no control over how and when i shoot so instead half the screen is obscured by a barrage of bullets? why does it switch between first and third person for seemingly no reason with no warning? why am i suddenly playing worse mario kart? why am i doing literally any of this????); and the rhythm game sections are so poorly utilised and occasionally poorly or confusingly timed, with no settings to configure for any incongruences betwen the player and the game such as delays caused by bluetooth speakers and the like nor any in-game way to properly adjust volume for both music and sound effects, that i honestly feel some level of offense at it even being purported to be a rhythm game in the first place. if you go into this expecting literally anything from it As A Video Game it is sorely disappointing. also not to be incredibly petty but even the tarot themeing is ridiculous as it never has any understanding of the actual cards it uses past the most basic, surface level, or literal interpretations like yeah sure let's use the chariot to turn into an ugly car with crazy autodrift that makes it a nightmare to control but it tooootally looks super cool !! whatever. keep shaking keys in my face like i'm a toddler it's totally gonna keep me invested this time i don't need anything of actual substance just keep hitting me with the bright flashy colours and nostalgia bait and prove to me that video games are art but only if they feel embarrased by the medium and are actually a super cool elevated secret thing that's Better than a ~normal game~. why the hell not at this point.

nothing about sayonara wild hearts justifies its own existence as a video game to me: the soundtrack is enjoyable and at times (when it's not constantly blasting flashing lights and effects in my face in a way that makes me feel like i'm watching a 90s mecha anime trying to permanently damage my corneas) the visual style is somewhat interesting but i'm convinced it would have simply worked better without any gameplay as a series of animated music videos or the like. at one point while "playing" this game i got up from my computer, went to my kitchen for a glass of water, and walked back over to sit down again and the game was still running through the level without my avatar having crashed into a single thing despite my not providing any input for a solid minute. it does not feel like it is meant to be played and it feels almost as if it prides itself on this fact. deeply frustrating game.

(also, the supposed narrative of the game of a woman, idk, reconciling with her feelings and experiences after breaking up with her girlfriend(?) through the events of the game aren't exactly all that engaging either. if i wanted to experience being a lesbian with ~big feelings~ listening to cool music i would simply put on a pair of headphones and go about my day because that's just life lol)

best breakup ever